A Contest Winner has been chosen

Hey what's up everybody ..A contest winner for this wek has been chosen after a week of a bunch of great quotes . We had over 30 entries and the winner was a tough decision. I will be contacting this person for their personal paragraph for the monday column .

And look for the brand new contest in my Mondays Column so if you didnt win this time , there's always next week .

Rich's Friday Winddown Dilly Yo !

Well I hope everyones holiday was great , The next day off of work will be Xmas ...AARRGGHH !!

This is the last day for Contest Entries , I will be judging them and contacting the winner on saturday so he or she has time to put together there paragraph for the Monday Column ...Good Luck.

Halle Berry wants more woman action stars , hey Halle ..The only reason we come to your movies is in the hope for a shower scene or something silly .

The Osbournes are a huge hit but Jack and Kelly say sone of the Key scenes were stages by MTV for dramatic effect ..say it isnt so Ozzy ?

Zsa Zsa Gabor is in a coma after the car she was riding in struck a lightpole , I guess there will be no Green Acres for her , huh ?

You say your sick of this planet and wish you had your own , well wait around a couple hundred years for the next one to form ...Tick , tick , tick ..

A overprotective mother in Cambodia didnt want her partying daughter to go out so bad that she nailed her foot to the floor ..OUCH !

Whips..NO..Chains ..NO . Handcuffs are the hottest sex toy on the market right now . I guess all these lasies are watching a little too much charlies Angels these days ?

Have a John Travolta Christmas with this item .

And around the cheek they come , its shaver by a length , rounding the chin ....Its shaver by a whisker !!

Ever wonder what your favorite star's evil counterpart would look like ?? ..Well this website shows you just that .

Hey Parents , you have a feeling litty billy "discovered " himself ...well the goverment has something to say about it .

I wouldnt even know where to start to try and explain why and what the hell this is all about ...check it out for yourself .

Ohh Tyra , just dont !!

Anna panty shot

Girls Gone Wild ...here ...and here ...and here ... and here

Have A great Friday and Look for the contest winner in Mondays Column !

Happy Thanksgiving

Hey , Everybody have a great Thanksgiving , I am taking the day off today but keep those contest entries coming , I got about 12 already and some real funny ones ...

For those who dont know here is what Im talking about :
I will be running every week in my own column , here's how it works : I will put a picture up on a link for all of you to look at and the person who comes up with the best and funniest quote for that picture will win( I will be the judge)...well since we dont get paid for this , I wont be able to pay anything but this is what I will do ..I will ,1. give you mad props in my Monday write up, and 2. let you write a short paragraph saying whatever it is you want and I will put it in the opening monolouge of my Mondays column each week ..Good luck all and dont forget to email all entries to Richie@thedailycolumn.com .

Here is the photo : Contest Photo

Rich's Humpday happenings

Well it looks like I will be left to hold down the fort here for a little while since everyone else is going away for the holidays but I am a big boy and will manage ...

Ok, Now onto the contest I will be running every week in my own column , here's how it works : I will put a picture up on a link for all of you to look at and the person who comes up with the best and funniest quote for that picture will win( I will be the judge)...well since we dont get paid for this , I wont be able to pay anything but this is what I will do ..I will ,1. give you mad props in my Monday write up, and 2. let you write a short paragraph saying whatever it is you want and I will put it in the opening monolouge of my Mondays column each week ..Good luck all and dont forget to email all entries to Richie@thedailycolumn.com .

Here is this week CONTEST PICTURE ...Good Luck.

Just for the record too , I hate fuckin snow with a passion !!

Ok , This guy grades little kids artwork..This is one of the funniest websites I have ever been too .

See how Micheal Jackson face went from black man to circus freak in this history photoline .

Bored you say , Try your luck at Cat Bowling ...Poor fluffy ...

See It's not just a Gay thing anymore ..Now HIV is equal among all sexual preferences..Damn you crackheads , we had the lead too !

Last night's Osbournes was great and Kelly looked so hot , I think im in love in a Olivia Newton John way though??

All the women who read my write up here should pay close attention to the title of this article ..CLOSE ATTENTION !! (guys you can look too, but dont get any ideas.)

So you say your pet rat "Bitey" can really run that wheel?...well try his little paws at the Rat Olympics .

The Bush's are total morons...Jed sends a letter of Congrats to a loser .

Eminem's old house just went up for bid on Ebay and I figured it was too big of a story to just put below .

Some Stupid Ebay Stuff:

Mom , Im embarrased now ..drop me off down the street and dont crush anyones car leaving ..OK ?

Caution , This vehicle makes wide right turns and for that matter left turns too .

Times were tough at the high school so they decided to take on a sponser for the school band ...TGI fridays now sponser the uniforms ..

How NIICCEE ...

That Marylin Manson is a lucky freak ...Ohh Rose

Tonight is the Biggest night of the year for Bars , So be respondsible and stay alive ..Dont Drink and Drive ...and If your up in Branford , Come see me at Donovans Reef ...We should be hoppin !!

Dont forget to send in those contest entries too !!

Snow on the way

Looks like we're in for some (possibly significant) snow on Wednesday. Laurie and I are flying to L.A. on Thursday, so I guess for us, Wednesday is better than Thursday. Get this, she's never flown before. Thirty-six and she's never flown. Imagine that. Oh yeah, that means they'll be no postings (by me) for Thursday, Friday & Saturday.

"Stone Cold" Steve Austin is now officially a wife beater and has been sentenced to one year of probation, a $1,000 fine, domestic violence counseling and 80 hours of community service.

A family from Montenegro thought the World War II artillery shell they were using to replace a broken table leg was safe, until it exploded, injuring eight people as they were about to eat a meal.

Supermodel Heidi Klum is getting divorced.

Nice bikini (bottom).

Nice boots.

Nice couch.

I used to love this game: Tempest.

Start of a short week

Miss Canada, Lynsey Bennett, left Nigeria one hour before the pageant officials decided to move the event to London. Why? Becasue she was scared shitless. The pageant was moved due to nearly 100 killings from pageant-related rioting. So what did the pageant officials do? They disqualified her. Shmucks.

Cool shot of the Space Shuttle evening lift-off.

The Bush twins are now twenty-one.

Shaved.

The world's largest known snake in captivity, (21 feet long), has died.

In other snake news, a Malaysian snake charmer lost patience with his lazy cobra and was killed after he pulled the snake out of its box and it bit him.

In California next month, two experimental billboards will be able to "sense" which radio station the majority of motorists are tuned to as they drive by and the ads on those boards will be tailored to that audience.

Cool sculptures made out of hubcaps.

Know someone who's really into fishing? Get them this remote.

Okay gadget lovers: How many of these "forgotten" electronic items did you buy? I had one of these. My brother still has one of these and one of these. These too.

This is fun: Create your own President Bush speech.

Here are a bunch of unanswered questions.

Useful! Every rule for games and more.

Rich's Top O the week Joint !

What's up everyone , hope you all had a fine weekend and i just want to start out with a couple things before i get into my stuff...

Well It looks like it's back to the same old shitty Soprano's after a real stinker last night . I mean cmon , Ouija borads and dreams about catapillers in a mob story ....Gimmie a fuckin break and whack me right now and put me out of my misery please.

As I was watching the Buffalo game on TV yesterday , The announcer made a comment I could not believe ..It seems Travis Henry, Bills running back's Grandmother has 13 kids and ...are you ready? ...99 grandchildren !!!

Ok , now onto the good stuff:

An American Indian tribe member is saying Federal agents are in fridging on his relgious rights because he wants to give his 4 year old son PEYOTE, this guy should win parent of the year .

The Manatee's are next ...OJ was fined for speeding a powerboat through a Manatee no wake zone ...this guy just cant catch a break !

Two skydivers collided in mid-air and tangled their parachutes about 30 metres above the ground before falling to their deaths..I dont know about you but this and drowning are the worst ways to go ..agree ?

What a frigin scam ...The Bachelor and his fiancee has spoken twice since the show ended and have no plans of getting married....All of you clones who watched this piece of shit should be spanked !!!

Canada's prime minister Jean Chretien has told his country's media that George W Bush is not "a moron."..No, No Jean you were right the first time .

Need a new crease in those pants ?? ..there is a new sport called "Extreme Ironing " ...No really ?

This guy's house blew up twice ...Guy, buy a frigin condo will ya already ?

These guys better be getting paid overtime .

Ebay items of the wierd :

Hey , The ashtray was just here a second ago ..??

Johnny was worried about his forgetful girlfriend , so he bought her a nice present ...This is his gift to her !

A handy mans special ...A nice little fixer upper...My Lord.

Nicole Kidman HERE , and HERE

What an ass here ....There is no comparison !

I have a contest Im going to run in my column and I will fill you all in on the details of it tommorow , but until then Have a Great Monday !

Looks like I'm next

Laurie and I went to a fun wedding last night. She caught the bouquet and I got the garter. I guess that means we're gonna be next. (Shh. Don't tell her but that's my plan anyway) Laurie looked so hot last night too. Congratulations to Peggy & Charlie.

The Miss World officials moved the pageant from Nigeria to London after three days of Muslims killing Christians.

A 50-year-old scientist burned his penis after using his laptop computer on his lap for about an hour.

Doctors for 47-year-old Kevin Gilvary discovered an inch-long bug was living in his back for the past 3 months.

Page 3 Girl wannabees.

Two dozen people were arrested last night at The Other Ones concert in Hartford.

Al Kayda get harassed every day because of his name.

Ladies. need some tightening up down there? Try the Kegelmaster 2000.

The World's Oldest salad dressing.

Bored? Give a visit to the Toilet Museum. Or have a fight with Grampa. You can play "You Killed Kenny" or play Happy Pill. Or you can make some origami with your money.

Nice bodypaint job. And another.

See you tomorrow.

Incredibly fucked up people

What the hell is wrong with these people. 105 people killed because of a beauty pageant? These are some incredibly fucked up people. (The same people, incidentally, who have no problem stoning a women to death for having a baby without being married.)

Balls!

Ok, everybody. How ballsy is my brother Peter?? Here he is, with his finger all bent out of shape and he's still able to deliver a kick ass fax to a snooty doctor! I LOVE IT!!! Excellent job, Peter...now go get that finger fixed, it looks freakish....

The "Receptionist Nazi"

So, yesterday I went to the doctor to have my finger checked out. The guy at the reception desk started asking me all of the "new patient" info, and was entering it into his computer. When he asked me for my Social Security Number, I told him that I don't give it out, but that I would supply my CT Driver's license number instead.

He said I was required to give him my SSN, and I told him I was not legally required to give it to him. Then he said if I didn't give it to him, the doctor would not see me. When I again told him I would not give him my SSN, he said "well then the doctor won't see you," and he deleted my record from his screen. (The guy was a total dickhead.)

Now, I never told this "Receptionist Nazi" that I am an attorney. Instead, I went back to my office and sent the doctor this fax. Hopefully, he will respond with a good answer. If and when he does, I will let you know his reply.

Why did I make a big deal about giving out my SSN? Well, to prevent "identity theft" for one thing. Once someone has your SSN, the sky's the limit as to how they can fuck with you. Is the doctor likely to do something with my SSN? No, probably not. But who the hell knows who else has access to the information on his computer.

So when are you required to provide your SSN? Here's the run down:

In any situation that involves reporting to the IRS, (banking, stock market, property or other financial transactions and employment records) your SSN must be provided. Some State and Federal agencies are required by law to obtain your SSN for certain purposes. When this is the case, they are also required by law to provide you with a Privacy Act Statement.

Other than that, you are not required to provide your SSN to anyone else. You are not legally required to provide your Social Security number to any private business, including health care providers and insurers, (again, unless it's a transaction in which the IRS requires notification). You are not required to give it to credit card companies, utility companies or landlords. They are allowed to request it, and they can refuse to do business with you if you won't give it to them, but you are not legally required to give it to them.

That's it for today. Hopefully Rich and LilSis covered some fun stuff.

Rich's Friday Short Stuff

Well I wasnt going to even do a column today but after reading Matlock's column I figured I would give you a couple fun things to check out while Pete plants the dynamite under his doctors car .

So here goes :

Hey Smokie , You got knocked the Fuck Out !!....The 3rd installment of Friday opens tonight everywhere, I recommend that you check it out .

I know I might get alot of Crap for this but I hope CT passes the No-Smoking law in bars and restaurants , I have been bartending in this stuff for so long now I probably have cancer and have never smoked a day in my life .

Last night in Detroit , A girls high school basketball playoff game raised a lot of sportsmanship questions when the final score was 115 -2 . They must have played that blind school or something ?

Two predominantly white fraternities at the University of Virginia were suspended by their national organizations after students showed up dressed as the Williams sisters at a halloween party...I say give these guys the 50 bucks for first prize.

Ebay weird Items :

Hey , Who keeps kickin me under the table ??

If your looking for a edge to sell something on Ebay , This is one way to do it ...look at the picture .

If you ever think about moving to California , you got to be driving this or dont think about moving at all ....you got is homie ?

You know there are real Ninja's right , No Im not shittin you , there are .If you want to read a real funny story click "pump up" at the top then "ultimate power " ..funny stuff !

Play Quick Draw..A good time

After watching the Victoria's secret thing last night I feel like slapping a couple Supermodels and this website lets you do just that !

Here is Gwen Stefani nipple slip.

Jamie Pressley skinny dipping

Donna Derrico tit falls out at awards show .

Stupid Things

Students at West Virginia set fires after their football team's win over Virginia Tech. I don't understand why people do this...I don't remember this going on when I was younger. What's the deal?

Speaking of college spirit...Now you can get a college logo on your casket! It looks like so far the only college with caskets in the bookstore is the University of Missouri-Columbia...oh well....

This idiot Massachusetts mom should go under the category of plain 'ol really stupid people.

Another Massachusetts Idiot...but this time, it's a beagle! Sorry, Woodsie, but you go under the category of plain 'ol really stupid dogs.

Hurry up and get your gorilla boogers- kids love 'em in Japan!

I don't think I would really be into a public autopsy, but who knows!?

if you need to translate English to a bunch of different languages or vice versa, this site is great!

Well, that's it for now, I'll write again in about a week when I get back from California!

Scientists creating life?

Going to the hand surgeon today to have him check out my finger. What a pain in the ass injury.

Here's scary for you: Scientists are planning to create a single-celled, partially man-made organism with the minimum number of genes necessary to sustain life. In other words, they are about to create a new life form.

This is scary too: The State Department has issued a Worldwide Caution for all US citizens.

A German doctor defied threats of prosecution Wednesday night and conducted a public autopsy in an art gallery, charging spectators $19 a head.

A New York man angry over the results of hair transplant surgery attacked a Stamford hair stylist with a baseball bat, police said.

Joe Lieberman said Wednesday he would "probably" seek the 2004 Democratic presidential nomination if Al Gore does not.

The Smoking Gun has collection of emails sent to the FCC by uptight folks complaining about last year's televised Victoria's Secret fashion show. It's hilarious to read what these "lingerie-phobic" morons have to say.

Queen Latifah was arrested for driving under the influence.

Here you go ladies, Ben Affleck was named People magazine's "sexiest man alive."

Useful: How to prevent farts.

Ladies: Relax with topless yoga.

Rich's Thursday's Dilly

So we had The Bachelor or Victoria's Secrets on last night , which one did you watch ?....The way I figure , why would I want to watch a bunch of hard up annoying chicks looking to latch on to a meal ticket when I can see chicks in bra and panties ??

Here's a laugher..Mike Piazza was visiting Italy yesterday trying to promote baseball and got to meet the Pope and what did he do you ask ??...He gave the Pope , the closest thing we have to god on this earth, a Mets jersey ??...Cant you just see the Pope shagging a few balls in the vatican backyard ?..what an ass !!

Scientists now say the the earth has a low risk of being hit by an asteroid that would end all life on this earth ...and I went out and bought all this canned food too ..Damn !

Some people just always have to be in the news cause they have nothing else going on ..Liza Minelli is defending Micheal Jackson actions with his baby ....I hear Kato Calian is on mike's side too .

OY VAH ...A Rabbi has been sentenced for trying to hire to men to kill his wife ..I guess the Lox werent up to par huh ?

Two postal workers were arrested in Germany after they unwittingly tried to sell high-tech telephone equipment stolen from the post back to the original owner....stupid people shouldnt work .

Now this guy will drink you under the table , He has been named "Beer Drinker of the Year ".

Jerry Lewis isnt looking good these days , Maybe the next Austin Powers movie is in the future for him ?

Ever been with someone who is so drunk you have no idea what the hell they are talking about , well this website breaks it down for you and translates that silly drunk talk.

If you really care , Here is the story of Nose-Picking.

If you think your man enough , Take the Exteme Survival Quiz ..I did and thank god im still a man .

A couple weird Ebay Items :

Elvis is probably turning in his goddamn grave after this one

Well you have Elvis , you gotta have Prisillia..I mean you went this far ?

I swear if I hear of oe guy wearing THIS, or THIS , or THIS (by the way which are the most disturbing ones)...An ass kickin will be in order !!!

Rachael Leigh Cooke is a hottie !

Tara Reid has no shirt on and Carson is a Fag !

Sabrina the Teenage Witch aint so teenage anymore !

Ok guys and girls ...see you tommorow !!

What the...?

What the hell is up with Michael Jackson? Can you say FREAK? I just don't get it.....

Who needs to go to a shrink? Try this fun ink blot test right at home.

Ouch! This hurts my eyes, but is neat....

Did you ever have to get a savings bond for someone as a gift? I hate going to the bank, so this site makes it very convenient.

They lost last night, but hey, they're still doing great! Gotta love those Bruins!

That's it for now!

Taking a break

Rich's entry pretty much covered everything, so I'm taking a break today. Thanks Rich.

Rich's Humpday Happenings

What's up Ya"ll, Got back from Flickerstick late last night and was too hung over and tired to write a column but let me tell you that they fuckin rocked Irving Plaza last night like no other band could ....We are gonna do a road trip Thursday to Boston to see them at the Middle East .....great time . If you get a chance to see them out live , do it you wont regret it !

Not that it isnt wierd enough that Michael Jackson has kids of his own, but now he is dangling them over hotel balconies 6 floors up with one hand ...I am , for the first time at a loss for words here ?

Scientists say there are two black holes on a collision course for each other in outer space ...I had something really bad to say here but I am gonna be good , get it ?

An ex-informant for the Drug Enforcement Administration was executed Tuesday night for the 1989 murder of a Houston police officer. I say that isnt good enough , they should bring back public hanging for scumbags like this !

The D.C sniper shooting 911 telephone calls were released on tuesday , here are the transcripts for those calls , Again the public hangings would fit quite nice here or a car battery to there balls while covered in gasoline would make me a happy camper .

I always said to myself that I should get a home nurse , These Home Nurses said they will go to work nude if there employers dont help pay for there uniforms .

This Jackass cut off his left hand because he was unemployed ?? ..Come to America and live off the working people , we could always use more deadbeats here .

Ever wonder what you looked like when you were first born, well this website probably has your picture .

Im not sure if Peter wrote about this yet but the Human Transporter is coming out and it looks totally cool to do .

For all of you with a Hairy Ass , This website is gonna tell how to properly shave it ...and for you general hairy people , there are tips for all other parts of the body .

I needed this last night , The Global Hangover guide .

This is hysterical , you will laugh your asses off ...I promise !

Not sure if your colorblind or not , take the test you blind bastard .

So you say you need a haircut and wouldnt it be nice if porn stars had a place where they cut hair topless ? ...me too and here it is !!!!

A couple wierd ebay items :

Ill bet ya Santa aint gonna park his sleigh on this guys roof anymore ??

This has to be the ugliest thing I have ever seen ..EVER !

Uncle Jimmy is a serial murderer and you cant seem to find the right paper to wrap his present in ..well here's an idea.

If it's an ass war , I got some ammo ..

I got another here

And Britney Spears in a freezing cold room

See you guys tomorrow !!

He's alive (for now)

Well, it looks like it's official: The audio tape is real and therefore, Osuckme Big Lardass is alive. Obviously, this is bad news, but this next one is even worse....

A "Secret Court" ruled the U.S. government has the right under the Patriot Act to use expanded powers to wiretap terrorism suspects. The Patriot Act was thrown together and made into law a mere month after the 9/11 attacks. (With little, if any attention to the Constitution) Think Osama is dangerous? This guy is far more dangerous.

Tough guy actor James Coburn died Monday. He was 74.

Got some money to burn? The Segway Human Transporter has gone on sale for $4,950 on Amazon.com.

Alabama Chief Justice Roy Moore (a devout Christian) had a 5,300-pound granite monument depicting the 10 Commandments installed in the state building. Fortunately, U.S. District Judge Myron Thompson found that the monument violated the Constitution's ban on government promotion of religion, and he gave Moore 30 days to get it out of the building. Good ruling!

Okay you gadget lovers, here's the first true PDA wristwatch. It's probably pretty useless, but it's a gadget.

Here's a new twist on the "Am I Hot or Not" pages.

This is useful: 99 ways to open a bottle of beer. And so is this Survival Guide for Taking a Dump at Work.

And let's end it off with four nice looking photos.

Ice storm? What ice storm?

Thousands of Connecticut residents remain without power after an ice storm crippled part of the state. But the ice storm had absolutely no effect on anything down here in the New Haven area, where is just rained.

What a surprise. Iraq said it would launch strikes against Israel if it was attacked by Britain and America.

Here's the details on that story I told you about a month ago where Saddam's email account was hacked.

An 84-year-old Japanese man with dementia took a 55 kilometer journey sitting on a 10 centimeter thick cable connecting two train cars.

In Pasadena, California, a city sewer line backed up into homes and volcanos of shit was the result.

Ninja stick figures.

Here's a fun jet game. And have some fun plucking this guy's moustache.

I made one of these potato guns last year and it blew a hole in Laurie's son's bedroom ceiling. Oops. Be careful if you buy or make one, they can be dangerous.

Natalie is gorgeous.

Russell Crowe is "taking a break" from showbiz after admitting he is suffering from massive stress an enlarged ego. Take a long break Russ, like forever.

Ahhh...a new week!

Here are some things that I did not do over the weekend:

I did not pretend I was in prison with this!

I did not make one of these, but I think it would be cool to do.....

I also did not make one of these and doubt I will, but I thought it was neat and worth posting.

I didn't really need to use the Dialectizer this weekend, either.

i did however, use this and my phone number is Hot!

That's all for now!

Rich's Top of the Week Joint

Goddamn does this weather totally suck or what , and late last night it started snowing a little bit and I thought I was going to have a heart attack cause if there is one thing I cant stand ...It's snow !!

Ok , first of all ...pretty good Sopranos last night but I say Paulie wil be whacked before the seasons end ..you think ??

Ok , Tonight is the Night ..I will be at the Flickerstick show tonight in NYC at Irving Plaza to see probably the best live band I have ever seen , you guys should definatley make the trip tonight , there are plenty of tix still available .

Girls , Wondering if you need a boob job ...take this quiz to find out or you can just ask me and I will need a feel test but I can tell ..

Remember to look up tonight between 11pm and 5am tuesday morning for the Meteor Shower that is going to happen , It is a awesome site it you can see it !

For all you Rednecks who like to watch Cars go around in circles 500 times, Tony Stewart won the Winston Cup Championship last night .

The Former Rolling Stone Bill Wyman has threatened a US journalist with legal action because he shares the same name as the musician...Hey Bill , get a frigin grip huh ?

Sacremento State football players sprayed themselves with PAM cooking spray thinking it would give them a advantage in a game against Montana , then got caught ??...I think I saw the butter people talking to the feds .

Here is a picture of the attempted Hijacker who tried to take a plane hostage using a penknife yesterday in Isreal ...do they still do death by stoning over there ...they should cause I have a pretty good arm !

Dont ask me why but this guy broke the World record by staying underwater for 10 full days without surfacing ...

Boy is that Matt LeBlanc a dumbass or what ??..Actors in US sitcoms are being told to speak faster to make their characters appear more intelligent.

This website is all about BUMS and real funny in a real sad kinda way ...but funny and sad , am I confusing you yet ?

This a cool game , Play some snow bowling.

These people want to phase out the human race and have a website to tell you why .....lets start with these morons , huh ?

Ever wonder what you would look like made of LEGO's ??

Reese Witherspoon is HOT !

Kate Moss topless ..nice !

Jennifer Love Hewitt here , and here

Hope to see all of you tonight at Flickerstick

Rainy Sunday

A statement attributed to al-Qaida threatened more attacks in New York and Washington unless America stops supporting Israel and converts to Islam.

This is a great short movie about a guy who accidentally opens a porn site at work, gets fired, and everything that happens to him as a result. If you have a broadband connection, watch it. It's 17 minutes long. If you don't have broadband, here's the low-speed crappy version.

A Scottish bus driver who forced female passengers to flash their breasts before he dropped them off has been jailed for two years.

Gross, but fun: The bathroom habits survey.

The First Viennese Vegetable Orchestra consists exclusively of vegetable-based instruments.

Here's a weird "conspiracy" site that discusses some "secret coding system" in our highway signs. I didn't take the time to read it.

Bored? Try some boxing. Or, listen to the beer song. Shoot some clay pigeons. Or try to get the clothes off this girl. I gave you farting nuns the other day. Today, farting dogs.

Another weird site: The Center for Prevention of Shopping Cart Abuse.

Here's something unique on Ebay: A World War II anal briefcase.

By the way, here's the winner of that "Miss Captivity" pageant I was telling you about the other day.

Oops! No one posted today

Late night last night. (Working, not not partying.) So, I didn't post anything, until now.

Three men have been arrested for plotting to release cyanide gas on the London Underground subway.

Sad. Both Pee-Wee Herman and Jeffrey Jones (the principal from "Ferris Bueller's Day Off") have been arrested on child pornography charges.

The SCI-FI Channel has sent a team of archaeologists to conduct an in-depth study of the Roswell, New Mexico UFO crash site

Steamed hot dog: The Oscar Mayer Wienermobile overheated the other day.

Idiots, idiots, idiots. Rev. Douglas Taylor (Idiot 1) sees the "hand of the devil" in Harry Potter books and films. So he staged a public ''book-cutting'' where he and five other pastors (Idiots 2 though 6) tore a copy of the book to shreds before a clapping audience of 100 people (Idiots 6 through 106). Never underestimate the idiocy of religious extremists.

Mutant.

A 14-year-old boy stole his teacher's cell phone and made more than $7,500 in calls to erotic hotlines.

One man was arrested and the other hospitalized for a stab wound after the two fought over who had the hairiest ass.

Mick Jagger (59) keeps trying to get a date with Swedish model Caroline Winberg (17), and she keeps saying no.

Another false chain letter

I've received this stupid chain letter several times, and you probably have as well:

Why not try to do without Saudi oil for a while? Every time you fill up the car, you can avoid putting more money into the coffers of Saudi Arabia and the terrorist they support. Just buy from gas companies that don't import their oil from the Saudis. Nothing is more frustrating than the feeling that every time I fill-up the tank, I am sending my money to people who are trying to kill me, my family, and my friends. I thought it might be interesting for you to know which oil companies are the best to buy gas from. Major companies that import Middle Eastern oil (for the period 9/1/00 - 8/31/01). Shell................ 205,742,000 barrels Chevron/Texaco....... 144,332,000 barrels Exxon /Mobil......... 130,082,000 barrels Marathon............. 117,740,000 barrels Amoco................. 62,231,000 barrels If you do the math at $30/barrel, these imports amount to over $18 BILLION! Here are some large companies that do not import Middle Eastern oil: Citgo.......................... 0 barrels Sunoco......................... 0 barrels Conoco......................... 0 barrels Sinclair....................... 0 barrels BP/Phillips.................... 0 barrels Hess........................... 0 barrels All of this information is available from the Department of Energy and can be easily documented. Refineries located in the U.S. are required to state where they get their oil and how much they are importing. They report on a monthly basis. Keep this list in your car; share it with friends. Stop paying for terrorism............. But to have an impact, we need to reach literally millions of gas buyers. It's really simple to do!! Now, don't wimp out at this point...keep reading and I'll explain how simple it is to reach millions of people!! . I'm sending this note to about thirty people. If each of you send it to at least ten more (30 x 10 = 300)... and those 300 send it to at least ten more (300 x 10 = 3,000) .. and so on, by the time the message reaches the sixth generation of people, we will have reached over THREE MILLION consumers! If those three million get excited and pass this on to ten friends each, then 30 million people will have been contacted! If it goes one level further, you guessed it..... THREE HUNDRED MILLION PEOPLE!!! . Again, all you have to do is send this to 10 people. How long would all that take? If each of us sends this e-mail out to ten more people within one day of receipt, all 300 MILLION people could conceivably be contacted within the next 8 days!!!

Well, as always, it's completely untrue. I'll say it again, every single chain letter you receive is untrue. Stop forwarding them. You are only perpetuating myths and wasting bandwidth.

Just some stuff

I hope you are enjoying my words so far....

It's always fun to figure out if a person is a man or a woman, don't you think?

It's also fun (and sometimes scary) to try and figure out just what you are being served on an airplane!

Any one of these make great stocking stuffers!

Be sure to visit this museum on your next trip to Beantown!

You gotta love Julia!
(she lived up here, too!)

That's all for now!

P.S.- Many thanks to Rich, Bobby and Big Bro for being my first fans.....

How do you say stupid in Arabic?

I'm tired, so it's a short column today.

Get this. The US military is facing a critical shortage of translators and interpreters for its war on terrorism. According to a March 2002 GAO report, (PDF file) the greatest number of unfilled Army translator positions is in Arabic. Of the 84 authorized Arabic translator positions, 42 were unfilled. So the Army has basically 50% fewer Arabic translators than it needs.

You would think the Army would do everything it could to attract and keep its translators. However, between October 2001 and September 2002, 9 Army translators, including six trained to speak Arabic, have been dismissed from the military not because they were poor translators, and not because they were disloyal, but simply because they are gay.

What the fuck?! So now some terrorists' plans may not be translated simply because of some Army officials' homophobia. Is ridding the Army of gays really more important than ridding the world of terrorism? The Army ought to spend more time making sure its priorities, rather than its soldiers, are straight.

Michael Jackson was hours late for court on Thursday and his lawyer "objected" to a photographer whose photo was plastered all over the net yesterday. The court, of course, didn't give a shit that Jackson didn't like the photo.

The Panevezys Penal Labor Colony Lithuania held the world's first prison beauty pageant, dubbed "Miss Captivity 2002." A 24-year-old female inmate won the televised event.

Terry Thompson signed up for AOL's free trial which ended up costing him $916 in long distance fees.

Finally, whose butts are these?

Rich's Rip It Up Winddown !!

Im gonna try to write one that stays in the middle here for more than a couple hours ,so here goes .....

Dont Call Me Now ?.. Miss Cleo , that frigin scam artist has agreed not to send out 500 million dollars in bills to settle a lawsuit by the goverment. First of all to even call these things you should be shot and when you get the bill it should come with a shoe that you should kick your own ass with cause your a dope !

Ohh Sure , Now that Gov. Rowland won again and announced that he isnt going to run again he suddenly grew a set of balls . He has stated that if the Union problems dont get worked out soon , he is going to lay of 300 state workers .

well if your like me and your up all night , Look up in the sky at about 5:35 Tuesday morning , there is supposed to be a meteor shower ....It is real cool to watch if you can see it .

Well 1 down , a couple million to go ....CIA shooter Kasi , a Pakistani , has been executed last night for his crimes ..hip hip horray !!

Deathrow records frontman Suge Knight had his house raided by FBI officials because he is being investigated for conspiracy to committ murder ..."Can you say electric chair jimmy" ??

Al-Qaida may be planning a "spectacular" terrorist attack intended to damage the U.S. economy and inflict large-scale casualties, the FBI warns...Lets turn the whole place into a Glass paking lot right frigin now !!!

Are they making Weekend at Bernies 3 yet ???....Two British mental health workers visited a woman patient, chatted with her, and then left without realizing she was dead.

Actor Jeffrey Jones, best known as the suspicious high school principal in "Ferris Bueller's Day Off," was arrested Thursday for allegedly having sex with a 17-year-old boy and possessing child pornography.

AAAAAARRRRRGGGGGHHHH !!!!

Ken & Barbie went on vacation and only Barbie came back ....where the ehll did Ken go ??

For all you WWE fans out there , A little Trish Stratus here , and here

Angeliana Jolie topless in the shower.

Ok, here is 2 for all you woman ...Mark Wahlberg at his lowest ...here , and here

Allright , See you all on Monday Morning ..and GO COWBOYS !!

4:00am thoughts

Last night, at about 4:00am, I was changing my son and was thinking that I would love to wrap a good stinky diaper up and mail it to somebody. Well, now I don't have to waste one of his and can easily ship one to an unsuspecting pal! What fun!

Since I am a new parent, I am concerned with things like recalls and other hazards out there. This site gives you all the updates on what might kill you or your kid! If you don't care about this sort of thing and feel like just taking your chances, you might want to consult this pleasant predictor! Yikes!

Ok, enough morbid stuff....

Did I mention that I was born on May 10, 1970? Any solid Bruins fan knows what happened on this day, but for those of you who aren't so sure, check this out!

I thought these pictures were creative.

Enough for now!

Michael Jackson's face

What the fuck did Michael Jackson do to his face?

Here's a good editorial on the "Total Information Awareness" citizen spying program the Department of Defense will be getting when the Homeland Security Act passes.

Can a small adult novelty store known as "Victor's Little Secret" hurt the image of "Victoria's Secret?" The Supreme Court has to decide. What do you think?

A 6-year-old girl who was trapped in a washing machine was rescued by a passer-by who smashed the glass window with a tire iron.

According to a survey of 19,000 adolescents in grades 7 through 12, most teens lose their virginity during the months of June and December.

Russell Crowe got into another fight. Wouldnt you just love to see this dick get the shit beat out of him?

A German man got caught trying to smuggle a python out of Poland by wrapping it around his stomach

Marge Simpson is getting a boob job.

Great ass.

Cool little computer!

So, do you think the 1969 Moon landing was faked by NASA? Here's a good site with a video to prove it was faked.

Nice top.

Bored? Play the Farting Nun instrument. Learn some cheesy pickup lines. Play some pong (well, you don't really play it, you watch it.)

You can now buy porn star action figures.

These breast moldings are cool.

Rich's Goodtime Thursday Stuff

Hey , Props goes out to Lilsis on her first column , I thought the Masshole thing was great ..keep it up !

Well Iraq finally is going along with the arms inspection thing after earlier this week saying they werent gonna ....They werent gonna ??. What are the fuckin nuts , do they all wanna commit suicide now or what till we shove a scud up there pieholes ??

Micheal Jackson is being sued again , this time for 12 million dollars ....no there are no little boys around for this one !

An unemployed British sysadmin is being indited on federal charges after the biggest "hacker " case where he hacked into Nasa and the Pentagon files ....Jolly good show dummy !

The Goverment has hired 40 actors to heckle U.S soilders in a mock arab town they set up for training ...What the fuck is this country coming to ??

Boy there are some big birds around here .....A drunk Pennslyvania woman drives pickup truck onto a airport runway ..Classic .

Most Kids lose their virginity in June and December ...Dont look at me , i dont know why either ??

The Uconn women's basketball team lost last night , Go figure .

Ebay items of the weird :

Please look at these , then look at the price , then look at these , then the price again ...WHAT ??

Want your son or daughter to never sleep again ??.. buy them this .

This is just so wrong ...look at the picture

For Sale , lazy guy's junk drawer ..can you be any lazier than this guy ?

Here is a quiz you should take at work , it is pretty good and tells you alot about yourself ..try it

Who thinks Madonna is still hot , I do .

A request for Brittney Murphy granted here ..you know her from the movie "dont say a word "

Here's Ashley Judd topless

See you guys tomorrow !!

Greetings from LiL'Sis

Hello there- I am Peter's youngest sister and I am very excited because my big bro said that i could write on his site! Thanks, Pete!

A little about me-I am 32, grew up in the eighties and played some memorable video games that you can download and play right now!

I live in Massachusetts, been married for almost 6 1/2 years(got engaged at a Bruins game!) and we have a 4 month old son. I have the privilege of staying home with him right now, and was a teacher and coach for the last ten years. I have never been arrested. So that's the deal about me, I hope you enjoy my words!

Speaking of words, I thought this was kind of cool- and great for those heated scrabble games...

Hey-Has Peter done a shameless plug of our brother-in-law's new television show on FOX? Watch it, it's funny!

Well, that's it for now....I will post again soon!

Is Bin Dickhead Alive?

Well, I talked to my doctor and he said that wearing this splint probably wont work. Unless I want my fingertip permanently drooped, I need to have it fixed surgically. Sucks, but so does the splint.

Apparently, some US officials think the latest Bin Dickhead tape is real, which would mean the fucker is alive.

Bob Knight has sued Indiana University, alleging his firing for berating students, coaches and staff breached his contract and cost him $2 million.

Idiot bank robber: A German bank robber who forgot to cut open eye slits in his mask and lifted it up to demand money was convicted and sentenced to four years in jail.

Manute Bol is gonna try his hand at ice hockey now.

Eric, the human Swiss Army Knife, carries more that 1,000 useful objects on him at all times.

Here's a weird looking new electric car.

Here's a great holiday gift idea for that special someone who farts-- the Fart Filter. And, for those who have difficulty waking up in the morning, how about the Sonic Boom alarm clock?

Bored? Play a little Midway. Check out what your first initial says about your sexuality. Or listen to Elmo's Got a Gun.

This place is running a washing machine continuously until it breaks. If you correctly guess when it fails, you can win £1000.

And, it's that time of year again: the 2003 Pirelli Calendar. Enjoy.

Finally, my sister will be contributing to the site beginning today. Give her a warm welcome.

Rich's Midweek Rants

I know this might be a little late because I forget to mention it in my last column but how fuckin good was the Sopranos on Sunday, I have been struggling through the first couple new episodes till sunday ...Huge Comeback !!

In typical Redneck name fashion... Hootie Johnson, president of Augusta National golf club has said he doesnt care what any womans groups say , there will never be a woman allowed in the club and the Masters will go on no matter how many protests there are .

Bobby Knight is suing Indiana University for firing him a couple seasons back for lost wages and of all things Mental Humiliation ?? Bobby Knight and mental humiliation go hand in hand but usually it is Knight giving , not recieving ...how irionic .

This is a freaky site , Run your mouse over the picture and watch what happens...Big Brother is watching !!

This is just idiotic and sad. This guy was surfing the net while his infant son was drowning in the bathtub. As a dad myself i have one thing to say : Watch Your Kids !!!

He hates these cars , stay away from the cars !! ..this guy takes out his frustration on his coworkers he has a problem with on there cars from a rooftop with a rifle ...how great is that ?

You hate that heartless bitch ??.. well here is your site to let her have it on ...

Looking for the closest and best Reggae festival around you say , well Rich is here to help you out .

Todd is a laid off lazy dot commer , go and meet him here ..

Anna Nicole Smith is now giving her dog Prozac ...one for you , one for me , two for you , one - two for me ...

A norwegian lady breastfed a litter of puppies after the mother died giving birth ..god damn lady , get a boyfriend please .

Jennifer Aniston is still hot here , and here

Katie Holmes topless here , and here

And Natalie Portman topless

Typing with a splint

So, I jammed the tip of it downward toward my palm last night. I heard a loud "snap," looked at my finger and this is what I saw. The first joint of my "fuck you" finger is now bent at a near right angle. I did some reading on the Net and it's called "mallet finger," and here's a diagram of what happened. Looks like I have to wear a little splint for 8-10 week. Sucks for typing.

A Cuban pilot and seven of his relatives crammed into a Soviet-made biplane and flew to freedom in the Florida Keys.

Stupid kid: Yet another teen has suffered serious burns after setting himself on fire trying to re-enact a stunt from "Jackass."

Joshua Jackson, of Dawson's Creek was arrested and jailed over the weekend for an alleged drunken assault on a security guard at a Carolina Hurricanes hockey game.

Pamela Dalton's job is to create foul odors. And she has created the foulest smell on earth, which she calls "Stench Soup."

An L.A. restaurateur has paid a $35,000 for one very large exotic mushroom.

Bored? Make your own Jerry Springer script. Or create some graffiti. Play a little "Nipple Concentration." Or a little pinball. Or convert a photo to ASCII art. And don't miss the Fellah whose Big Toe Could Predict Earthquakes.

This is too much of a pain in the ass to type. I'll practice more today and see you tomorrow.

Thank you to all veterans

Good posting, Rich. I second your Veterans' Day wishes. Over 42 million Americans have served their country in all wars. Of those, 650,000 died in action. They all fought, and many of them died bravely to protect the freedom we all enjoy-- freedom unlike those available in any other nation on earth.

Now it's time for me to get up on my soap box, because that very freedom is at risk. The Pentagon is constructing a computer system called "Total Information Awareness," that will give them instant access to all Internet mail, telephone records, credit card and banking transactions and travel documents, all without a search warrant.

Now, some of you may say "It doesn't bother me because I have nothing to hide." So, you have nothing to hide, huh? Bullshit! You're a fucking liar. Everyone has something to hide, something that they may be ashamed of, or just something that they would prefer others not know. If you say you have nothing to hide you are a lying sack of shit.

Besides, under your "nothing to hide" argument, it would also be okay with you for police to stop you for no particular reason and ask for identification, or to drug test you "just to make sure," or to stick their rubber-gloved fingers in your ass just for a "look-see." What do you care? You've got "nothing to hide."

The fact is you've got plenty to hide and plenty to fear. We all do. For God's sake, even if you have committed a crime, you have the absolute right to hide that fact. It's called the right against self-incrimination and it's in the 5th Amendment to the Constitution. (No person... shall be compelled in any criminal case to be a witness against himself.")

So what can you do about? Not much other than doing a better job at hiding things. The events of 9/11 have given the government an excuse to whittle away at our rights under the guise of "fighting terrorism." Most folks are afraid to speak out for fear of sounding "un-American." Of course, not speaking out when your government is wrong is the un-American thing.

If there is another terrorist attack that kills me, I'd rather die with all of the freedom I was born with, than die without the freedom my own government has stolen from me.

I'll return to the fun stuff tomorrow.

Rich's Monday Crap

Happy Veterans Day to all of you who served our contry and protected the rights which we have today and its because of you ...THANK YOU .

Jennifer Lopez and Ben Affleck are engaged ....lucky guy got that whole ghetto booty all to himself ..BASTARD !!

You will be able to rent all the new movies that are at the stores and watch them without ever leaving the front of your computer screen ,new online movie store is all set to go .

2 Guys from California who are sick of all those AOL discs that come to your house every other day have collected of 80,000 of them and plan to deliver them back to AOL in a dump truck when they get 1 million ...here is the website if you want to return a couple .

3 drunk men hijack a milk truck and hold the milkman hostage while they drive around looking for drugs ...No Really ??

Polly say screw you! ..Polly says screw you! ...A man in China is being sued because he taught his bird to speak badly to his neighbor .

Do you Fart in your car ...Well someone did a survey and these sad people are gonna tell you the details ...what smells in here ?

London sportscaster Nick Owen was turned away from a bar in London because it was too full , the name of the bar you ask ......The Nick Owen Club !!

Hey Cheech , Your screwed .....Officials say smoking 3 joints a day is just as bad as smoking 20 cigarettes a day.

This might be a little gay but here goes ..For all of you who dont live in CT , you just dont realize how nice the changing of the seasons are and the colors that come out in the fall ...here is a pic of it

UConn won there last game at Memorial stadium saturday because the stadium is being ripped down after this season and at the end of the game students wanted to rip the goalposts down but were sprayed with mace instead by campus security ...here is a pic of it . Now i can understand the police not wanting anyone to get hurt but do you think spraying them in the face with pepper spray is helpin them out , I dont ?

Asshole Rose , oh I mean Axl Rose is now blaming the stadium for him not showing up for the show in Vancover that cause a riot injuring dozens of people .

In Des Moines , Iowa ..Polk county officials have decided that they would give the rats that have become a problem in the basement of the courthouse that basement and move the people who work down there out ...Wait , you mean the rats won ?...what the hell is this world coming to , Go down there with a flamethrower and toast the little bastards !!!!

If Pimps rode motorcycles this is what they would look like ...

Jessica Simpson bikini top

Good Eliza Dushku here , and here , and here

And Halle Berry

and for all of you who think Meg Ryan is hot here , and here

More Winona

Police are investigating the apparent theft of a confidential court file on Winona Ryder containing information about her financial status, medical history and other personal background. The file was stolen from a locked file cabinet at the Santa Monica courthouse.

And, apparently, Winona's recent shoplifting trip wasn't her first.

Stupid crook: A man accused of robbing a grocery store left his identification and a family photo.

Avril Lavigne, without makeup.

Queen's "Bohemian Rhapsody" has once again topped a chart of all-time greatest hits. John Lennon's "Imagine" came in second, followed by The Beatles' "Hey Jude."

Recycled what? Santa Clarita, California became the first U.S. city to institute a diaper recycling program. 20 billion soiled diapers are buried in U.S. landfills every year, representing about 7 billion pounds of garbage.

Like gadgets? Here's one. (or two) They are walkie-talkies with GPS capability, enabling users to mark their positions relative to each other.

Alert: Good looking women in bikinis here.

Cool. Space suits for sale on eBay. (Actually chemical protection suits, but they look like space suits)

Dope and Stupid people

Get those checkbooks ready! John Lennon's dope box and pipe are going to be offered at auction.

Speaking of dope, Michigan District Judge Thomas Gilbert was spotted smoking a joint being passed along a row of people at an Oct. 12 Rolling Stones concert in Detroit. He went on indefinite voluntary leave. I've got no problem with him smoking pot (which should be legal anyway) but it wasn't the brightest thing in the world to smoke it in public.

A Janesville, Wisconsin man was so angry with his slow modem that he threw it on the grill and barbecued it.

Talk about irony. James F. Welles, who has written two books on stupidity was arrested for allegedly trying to arrange sex with a 15-year-old girl over the Internet. The girl turned out to be an undercover male detective. Well, he wrote the book on stupid.

Why people hate them: The Internal Revenue Service has concluded that government grants given to small businesses in lower Manhattan after the Sept. 11 terrorist attacks are subject to federal taxes.

Anyone see the Barbara Walters Special on the Osbournes? How about the "unknown" Osborne, Aimee? Cute? I think so.

Get this: Twenty-three states still allow paddling of students by teachers as a form of discipline in public schools. Most of these are southern states (you know, where the stupid people are kept) and the teachers are immune from prosecution under state law. If a teacher ever laid a hand on my kids, I'd sure as shit lay an even harder hand on them.

Rich's Wind Down Get Down !!

For those of you who know me , My favorite band in the whole world is Flickerstick ...who you ask ? ..well remember the show "Bands on the run" ..well this is the band that won that whole thing and believe me when I tell you if you havent caught them live or gotten there CD yet ,Get It !!...They are playing live at Irving Plaza on Nov 18th in NYC , go check it out and say hi to me while your there .

Ozzy and Lars from Metallica will lead a campaign against of all things , The Dangers of loud Noise ..Hello ??

And in other Osbourne News , Sharon is going to have her own "Oprah " style show starting this spring ...look out Maury !

Sniper John Allen Muhammad was due in court today to face charges stemming from his dumbass shooting spree...Hey George W. , A scud sent to this court room would be divine right now !!

McDonalds is going to close 175 restaurants nationwide ...Now where are all the STUPID people gonna work ??

Is Axl Rose the biggest asshole in the world or is it just me ???...he failed to show up for yet another show in Canada prompting the fans to start a riot ..Rich's tip of the day : Washed up rocked stars should show up to all there gigs !

Federal Aviation Commitee wont let Sioux City change there airport code , right now if you fly into Sioux city your tags are reading SUX ..

Some of my own Amanda Peet pics ..peter got the only good one already , BASTARD !!

Heres one

And another one

And another one here

My Ebay Wierd Items of the day ...

Ever just wanted to treat Dolly Parton like trash ??..well here is your chance !

I think I am going to be Violently Ill ..Right Now !!

Sure they a little tough to chew , But hell they are sweet still .you got to be real hard up for a sugar attack to bid on this !

Rebecca Romjin stamos ...Hot here .....and hot here ...and one more hot one here

Christina Ricci topless...and another Christina

Virus Warning!!!

Okay folks, this is a real one and not one of those damn hoaxes.

If you get a message like this, delete it:

Subject: you have an E-Card from
Message Body: Greetings!
has sent you an E-Card -- a virtual postcard from FriendGreetings.com. You can pickup your E-Card at the FriendGreetings.com by clicking on the link below.
http://www.frieeeting.com/203746/pickup.html?
Message:

I sent you a greeting card. Please pick it up.

A bunch of unrelated crap

A single squirrel that was terrorizing a London town has been shot and killed.

This woman claims to be the real Lisa Marie Presley.

Exploding electric razors?

What a fucking idiot. A New Brunswick "father" is suing the amateur hockey association after his 16-year-old son failed to win the league's most-valuable-player award.

Very cool. Match head art.

Quick fact: More U.S. homes have outhouses than TiVos.

Check out these amazing Etch-A-Sketch images.

This is fun to play with if you have nothing else to do.

This one will be fun to send to a friend. You may not want to click on it at work.

Amazing video. This guy just bought this helicopter and took it for a first flight before he learned how to fly it.

And Shepard Smith from Fox News screws up. Wonder what was on his mind?

Jim requested Amanda Peet. (I met her in the studio a few years ago) She is very hot.

Finally, remember the old Slinky ad? Here's a very funny spoof: The Dildo Song.

More Stuff from Rich

Damn , She's Guilty and didnt get The Chair ...Oh well maybe she'll get hit by a car walking out of the courthouse or something..

After the death of one of the founding members of Run DMC was murdered , Reverend Run and Dmc decided that they could no longer perform as Run DMC and decided to hang it up and retire

A man used a Screwdriver to break into the Norweigan Parliment building because he had to piss ??

Officals in Italy voted not to impose a Tax on all Pornography made or sold in that country ....now thats a spicy meatball !!

A man who has been Santa for years in the towns parades and so on has been arrested for murdering his daughter in a fight over Christmas Decorations .. you better not pout , you better not cry , you better buy the right lights im tellin you why ...Killer Claus is coming to town !!!

They did it again ....Florida forgot to count 103,00 votes in Broward county .

Speaking of doing it again ...Bobby Brown was arrested AGAIN !!

Here is tha Daily installment of Ebay wierd Items ....

Ok , I know you like the Doors but if you ever wear this out of the house , Ill punch your lights out !!

What the Hell would you possibly do with this thing ??

So your wife is breaking your balls about bringing you hunting with her , huh ...this will solve all of those problems !!

You Vill eat you lunch DAMMITT !!

This Dentist got it all figured out , He will buy back your kids Halloween candy from them !!

Parents are wondering why the new Harry Potter toy , The Magical Vibrating Broom , are keeping kids busy and are wondering why the batteries drain so quick ....lol

I got a request for Eliza Dushku and at first i didnt realize who it was , but now i know ...its that hot chick from Bring It On ..here we go

here's one

And another one

and another one in a bikini

and another one here in a bikini

So what's gonna happen on March 8, 2003?

Okay, what the hell is this all about? According to the author of this website, "On March 8, 2003, Something extraordinary will be posted on this site. Something that will shock you. Something that could have Global implications. Something that will make you want to rethink your future..."

Read the story on the site. It's weird. It might be nothing more than a promo for a movie. Or it might be something truly "extraordinary." But remember, the "IT" turned out to be a scooter. (A very cool scooter, but still a scooter.)

Rolling Stone magazine has three great Simpsons covers. This one, this one and this one. And here's the animated version if you have high-speed access.

This is scary: Two patients at a New York City hospital have been diagnosed with Bubonic plague.

I posted a photo of this from a spanish language page a few weeks ago. It's a tiny humanoid creature that was found in Chile. Whatever it is, it's weird.

Here's a low tech (but effective) method of computer security.

Five-term CT State Rep. Dennis Cleary lost his bid for re-election. He was opposed by his own family members, who were unhappy about his handling of a probate matter. They had taken out a newspaper ad and planted signs on their lawns in support of his opponent.

I like this "403 Forbidden" thong. I'm gonna order it for Laurie.

A few games: Cat bowling, Breakout, Moon Lander and 2 Bin Laden games: the Bin Laden Shootout and Kill Bin Laden.

I have no idea if this would actually work, but here are the plans for "The Fly Plane."

Here's a great shot of Jennifer Love Hewitt, from behind.

Winona Found Guilty

Winona Ryder was found guilty of grand theft about an hour ago.

A Tennis Hottie Request ....

Boozer emailed me and wanted pictures of tennis hottie Jelena Dokic , So here we go ...

Here is some Jolena Bootie

Look reaaaall closely .....you see it ?

Here is her unoffical homepage ....good stuff here

Dont stick it out unless your gonna use it !!

A couple pics ..

here

and here

No more political ads

Well, the elections are over. The net result? Some won, some lost, few care. At least the damns ads are over.

The head of the SEC, Harvey Pitt, resigned.

A husband, wife, two 14-year-old daughters and a 16-year-old stepdaughter were all arrested Friday after they robbed a bank to steal money for a mortgage payment.

Here's a funny shot of some reporters trying to record the sound of a politician's ass.

The world's longest car is for sale.

Porn star Jenna Jameson is taking legal action to halt a promotional scheme that suggests she had a lesbian relationship with Britney Spears.

NASA has commissioned a book to proved that we did, in fact, land on the moon.

The Army has a new, cool laser beam weapon.

Coming to help: Workers at a Romanian car factory have decided to donate their sperm to get the debt-ridden plant out of the red.

An Egyptian woman set fire to her apartment after an argument with her husband over his refusal to buy dried fruit and nuts.

Here's a fun game: Ice Arena. And this is fun too: Sketch yourself.

We need one of the Japanese restaurants around her to do this.

Okay, I'm tired. Bedtime.

Rich's Hump Day Rants

Ever hear the Penis song ..well here it is

The Supreme Cort seems to be in favor of the "Three Strike Law" which can send a person to life in prison for things as little as shoplifting if it is the 3rd offense...Hey the way I look at it , If you wanna do the crime , you gotta do the time , Screw Em !

Denying earlier reports that Sharon Osbourne said this will be the last season of "The Osbournes", Sharon Osbourne came out and said that the reports were wrong and the Osbournes will be around a long time ..Good News !

The Former Butler of Princess Di who was acused of stealing from her and then aquitted of those charges will be staring in a game show in the U.K called "What the butler saw " .....what a frigin joke , let the dead princess die already !

Well the case of the Winona Ryder shoplifting case has been turned over to the jury , Oh I hope she gets the chair !!

I know it might be a little out of date , but for all you Card collectors this site will be very very helpful .

Ebay items of the wierd nature :

Luke , Come to the High Side ...what the fuck , no wonder no one bid on it ???

Screw waiting around for George W, Buy your own Jet and take matters into your own hands !

All rooms are well Air Conditioned ( from the gaping missle holes in the walls ) ...Buy your own hotel ..in Afganistan !

This site tells you how to do almost anything , and I mean anything ....No Really , Anything !!

Im going to expand on Peter's Heidi Klum here .....and here .....and here

A little Britney Spears

And Kirsten Dunst is always a winner

Hey. Go vote

Jonathan Harris, who played Dr. Zachary Smith on Lost in Space, has died. (Thanks for the heads up, Brian)

The Power Nap Club at Greenwich High School has grown to about 20 members.

Our President.

Yet another way to quit smoking-- the nicotine lozenge. This guy ought to consider it.

Four weeks ago, the Chicago Sun-Times recently dropped 20 wallets all over Chicago. So far, 11 of the 20 have been returned, and only one was missing the cash.

Nice top, Heidi.

Hey HBO, I got news for you. Your top show sucks now. You ought to be encouraging viewership.

A letter from a Yahoo! janitor. Another reason to give MyWay.com a shot.

Nice top, Jennifer.

Like Ms. Pacman? Here's an online version. (Note: You have to put a "coin" in to play.)

Here's a new craze from Japan called Meary. Here's a collection of Meary pix. I haven't seen them around here yet. Have you?

Finally, a great soundboard from Full Metal Jacket.

Yahoo without Ads

A 7.9 earthquake hit a sparsely populated area of Alaska. That's a powerful quake. Here's a list of the largest quakes recorded since 1900.

This looks promising. It's a new portal/search engine/directory called My Way. It's like Yahoo without any ads! Plus, they have a very simple and straightforward Privacy Policy. It can be personalized, too.

Nearly 200 cars and trucks collided in a pile-up on the Long Beach Freeway in California.

Moron for a Mayor: Mayor Jay Lee of Virgin Utah charges residents $25 every time they speak up at zoning and planning meetings, in order to keep the meetings "short and civil."

The BBC's Top Gear magazine has concluded that the average driver emits more than 912 pints of fart inside a car during his or her lifetime.

Interested in trying some new sexual positions? Here you go.

Winter's just around the corner. How about some Possum Fur Nipple Warmers & G-strings?

Very cool! The Incredible Rubberband Machine Gun!

Here's a question that I've never been able to find an answer for: How do completely bald Orthodox Jewish men keep their yarmulkes on? I should know this because I'm Jewish, but I don't. I know it sounds like a joke, but I'm serious. Do they use glue or something?

A Britney "Dress-Me-Up" doll.

A London company is dying dogs and sending them out on the streets as "dogvertisements."

And Jim requested Kelly Monaco.

Richs Monday Stuff

New York has super cops ....here is why . They think they have a lead into who shot Run DMC's Dj Jam Master Jay a couple nights ago ...here is who they are looking for ..A black male 180lbs ,6 "2 in height wearing black...that guy has got to stick out like a sore thumb in New York ...like I said Super Cops !!!

6 members of Al Queida, Including one main suspect leading to Bin Laden were killed in a car bombing yesterday ...HURRAY !!!

Foran High School in Milford was in Playboy this month because apparently someone mowed a 25 ft long penis into the moutain side near the school ....now thats higher learning !!

Ok , now dont get to upset but The Country Music Legends Statler Brothers played there last concert saturday night ...I know, I know Im fighting back the tears too ..

Im going to be doing some weird Ebay stuff that if you read this in time you just might be able to bid ....

Here is an ashtray for the sofisticated smoker , like they say diamonds are a smokers best friend ....wait is that right ??

I am not even gonna get into this one , you can look for yourself but thing I cant believe is that someone bought it ??

This guy has been spending too much time in the bathtub , read this write up ...It is unreal !!

As one of the biggest fans of Opie and Anthony , I feel compelled to keep you updated on there doings , they posted a letter to the fans on their website ...here it is . And here is the underground O & A message board where you can voice your disgust with the FCC and others !!!!

Ever been to Burning Man ?? Are you asking "what the hell is Burning Man" right now ??....check it out !!

J LO is hanging out .

Heres a blast from the past ..Daisy Fuentes .

Anna just aint right at all !!

Hey dont forget to send those pics in of your girl , your wife , hell even your mom if she's a MILF for the Mrs Daily Column contest ..its quite an honor .

Stop stealing my bandwidth

Okay, let's chat a moment about "hotlinking" and bandwidth theft. After checking my logs, I found about 10 sites all over the net that were stealing my bandwidth by "hotlinking" directly to photos posted here, so that they magically appeared on their site.

I don't give a shit if you take the photos and repost them on your own site, but don't just hotlink to them. That uses my bandwidth, and that's stealing, plain and simple. Use your own fucking bandwidth. If you want to show a photo from this site on your site, just download the photo to your own computer, and then upload it to your web server. That's it. Easy, huh?

Of course, since I control all of the photos here, those folks who have been hotlinking to them have found out that although they appear fine here, they soon appear as hardcore porn photos their site.

Enough said.

Nothing in particular

Australia's Environmental Minister is urging people to shower with a friend in order to help save water during the severe drought the country is experiencing.

A French woman accused of baring her breasts during an airport security screening pleaded guilty Friday and paid a $2 fine. (I guess a buck a boob.)

Here's an interesting clock.

This is funny: Swear Bear.

WTF? A Yugoslav Army paratrooper has survived a drop from an altitude of 3,300 feet after both his parachutes malfunctioned. Here's a list of other people who have survived incredible falls. And some more. And still some more.

Another good "page not found" page.

I'm a few days late for this one: A Bin Laden Halloween.

Twenty-three-year-old Kelly wants a boob job. And she's asking everyone on the net to pay for it.

Anna Nicole Smith before she was a blimp.

Got $7,500 burning a hole in your pocket? You can have your own "his and her" action figures made.

Find-a Vagina (a la Where's Waldo)

Richs Weekend Rant

Someone tried to kidnap one of the Spice Girls ..No Really ??

A Surprise witness in the Winona Ryder trial claims the security in the store vowed to "get that rich bitch " and "make evidence" against her ...the little thief is really reachin , huh ?

A Mass state trooper must pay back his pension after he tried to kill a state prosecutor when he caught the trooper destroying files ...INBRED !!

Martha Stewart has really got to think before she dresses for halloween these days ...what an ass !

The most comprehensive list of names for Vagina's and still growing everyday ...funny stuff !

This is the Ebay for all you Cigar Smokers reading this column , never pay full price again!!

So you say you wanna be a PORN STAR huh ?...well here is the place to apply ...you got no balls, DO IT !!

What , You think that Open Heart Surgery your having is too expensive ??.. well go online and haggle for a cheaper price DAMMITT !@!

This is perfect for the Stripper on the Go ..check it out !!

The guy selling this REALLY needs to get laid ....run doggie , RUN !!!

Ok , I give up ...how frigin HOT is Carmen Electra ??

Ali Landry is a close , close second !!

For the Bikers Reading ...STURGIS is here ..And by Bikers I mean Harleys @!

Damn! It's November already

BFD: Julia Roberts was in New Haven yesterday.

Idiots in charge: In Maryland, the McHugh family received a letter from village officials informing them that their Halloween decorations were in violation of landscaping rules.

More idiots in charge: In Atlanta, Jamie Maurice received a two-day in-school suspension and was barred from playing in the school's homecoming game. His crime? He kissed his girlfriend on the forehead in violation of the school's "inappropriate" contact rule.

Yet more idiots in charge: William A. Dorsey was suspended without pay from his job as a bus driver for refusing to put a bus he deemed "nasty and filthy and unhealthy" on the street.

When I grow up... (a new version of the Monster.com ad)

Smokin...

Urban Legends of Rock & Roll.

Jim requested Aimee Marciniak. I have to admit that I never heard of her, but here she is.

Todd requested Jennifer Love Hewitt. Not many revealing photos of her. This and this were about the best I could find.

Enron CFO gets what he has coming

Former Enron Corp. CFO Andrew Fastow was indicted on 78 federal counts. If convicted, he faces hundreds of years in jail and millions of dollars in fines.

More than 20 cities have signed contracts new police cars for $1 each in exchange for allowing advertisements all over them.

Nice top.

Regis Philbin and Kelly Ripa switched roles yesterday for Halloween.

Tonya Harding is not happy about the new "Tonya" hot sauce.

Drudge reported that Winona Ryder wore a see-through dress to court on Wednesday. A look at the published photos don't reveal anything. So, I loaded the photos into Photoshop and adjusted the levels. You can see what he was talking about in these versions of the photos.

Jim requested Jennifer Connelly. Ask and yea shall receive (if there's one out there, that is) And there is one out there of Jennifer, and here it is. Keep those requests coming.

Bored? Play some ping pong. Or shoot some hoops. Or play some paint-ball. Or, shoot a crossbow.

Here are some amazing videos of motorcycle antics.

Do you hate that stupid singing fish thing? You'll love this.

A Request Granted ...

Jdwys left me a comment saying they wanted Jennifer Connely pics ...a nice request indeed

Here is a page where you can stroll through about 195 hot pics of her ..some X rated

Here is a tribute page entirely about and for her ..

Jenny Topless here .........and here ......and here

another NICE view of Jenny

Well Jdwys , I hope you enjoy the whole Jenny Column cause it's for you !!