Saturday morning idiot roundup

Is Mike Tyson an idiot, or what? Read this.

Here's another idiot. Is one lung disease better than another?

And two more idiots for you: Two teenagers were arrested Tuesday night after police said they threw a life-size mannequin from an overpass into oncoming traffic.

A rich & famous idiot: Barbra Streisand is suing an aerial photographer for $10 million, claiming pictures he provides to others of her Malibu home and property violate her right to privacy. The thing is, this guy isn't a "paparazzi." He provides an aerial photography survey of the California coast for scientific and other researchers.

Idiot babysitters: A year-old baby was found at 3 a.m. Thursday, crawling down a major street in Orem, Utah, clad only in a soiled diaper.

Nice top.

Hot looking babe.

Check out this low rider golf cart.

This is funny: This guy tried to see how crazy he could make his signature
on credit card receipts before someone would actually notice? (Sorry for the pop-ups on the guy's site.)

A wanted man was arrested after his parole officer spotted him kissing his girlfriend in a live crowd shot displayed on the scoreboard at a Cincinnati Reds game.

Hey guys: Pick the correct urinal.

Check out this old telephone etiquette booklet.

Singer Carnie Wilson is going to show off her newer, slimmer body in Playboy magazine. She has lost 150 pounds after having her stomach stapled in 1999.

Rich's Friday Supercolumn

Well here comes the weekend , Let's hope the rain stays away long enough for us to party because we missed all the holiday partying last weekend.

Hey if anyone knows any good places to bring your dog swimming where they wont bother you , let me know because I have a Newfoundland that needs to be in the water soon or she's gonna crack ( preferably fresh water because washing a 195 lb dog after swimming all day is no picnic).

Ok , lets kick off the weekend DC style ...

Hello , Security ??..A would-be hijacker armed with wooden stakes stabbed two flight attendants as he tried to break into the cockpit of an Australian jetliner Thursday, apparently in an attempt to crash the plane.

Map the outer limits of your intellectual acuity by registering for the Google U.S. Puzzle Championship, a national online competition to identify America’s most logical minds.

This guy really didnt want to get pinched...A 30-year-old man forced his eyes out their sockets to protest his arrest at Athens International Airport

I climbed Mount Everest, and all I got was this stupid panoramic view. (requires QuickTime)..seriously , killer view !

Women , want to look like you are always cold ??..Wear this thing .

Drink too much last night ...Bet you didnt know it but there is an Etiquette to Vomiting .

A 36-year-old man was arrested Wednesday on charges of animal cruelty after he was accused of chopping off the tails of four puppies and two adult dogs and then storing the animals and their tails in a refrigerator. ..I say death by cutting his ass cheeks off and letting him bleed to death is fair , No ?

SEE , I knew it but who really cares.....Claims have re-emerged that the US space agency did find signs of life on Mars during the historic Viking landings of 1976.

Lots and Lots of Playmate boobies ...and were off .

Ron Jeremy as Mario Brothers ...LOL

Sit back and watch the corn fly ....A Nebraska lawmaker is so fed up with constituents crossing the state border to gamble that she proposed going to war with neighboring Iowa

Umm Mr program director , the left line is where you pick up your unemployment checks ... "Meow TV," developed by the Meow Mix Co., debuts Friday at 6:30 p.m. on the Oxygen Network. It's the first show targeted at cats. Not cat lovers. Cats.

File this one under Dumbass ....A Woman leads cops on high-speed chase to her house, thinking she can't be arrested at home

This is pretty cool ...Hubble Space Telescope finds giant, red rectangle in space (with pic)

If anyone is wondering what to get me for my birthday ...The Amazin' Beer Chiller... pretty damn cool! "The Amazin' Beer Chiller chills 12- and 16-ounce cans of beer from room temperature in TWO MINUTES"

Take this test to find out how your going to die ...you scared ?

HAVE A GREAT WEEKEND !

Calling God

In the movie "Bruce Almighty," God's phone number is apparently repeatedly displayed on the Jim Carrey's pager whenever the Lord tries to summon him. Well, instead of using a "555" number, Universal Pictures used a number that matches more than 30 listings nationwide. Those folks are pissed.

You can be rewarded with $ 1 million if you can find this nickel.

Bob Hope, who is sadly now near deaf and blind turns 100 years old today. Happy Birthday Bob.

An Iraqi man who was condemned to death by Saddam Hussein 21 years ago has emerged from a tiny wall cavity in his parents' house where he has been hiding for the past two decades.

In Britain, an Iranian asylum seeker, who is protesting against the possibility of being deported, has stitched up his lips, eyes and ears, and he is on a hunger-strike. He's also threatening to burn himself to death if anyone tries to force him to eat. Jesus, why not just let him stay? Are they concerned that so many other people will try to do the same thing? C'mon.

Last week it was a guy sitting on a milk-crate, this week it's a woman, 6 months pregnant, sitting on a set of subway stairs. Looks like NYC police can't stand to see people sitting.

Idiot: A 13-year-old Ohio boy who wanted to make his own version of "Jackass: The Movie" threw a cup of boiling water on his best friend as he slept, causing second-degree burns.

Part-time photographer Brian Smith sent me a photo of an albino squirrel. Thanks, Brian.

This is a very funny story.

What the hell is the problem with kids these days? A 12-year-old Bronx girl yesterday gave out sleeping pills to eight classmates at school.

Here's a great listing of Americana. It's an online guide to offbeat attractions called Roadside America. (Thanks for the submission, Michael.)

It's almost summer.

A Thursday Shortie

Just a shortie today because Im saving up for my Friday Supercolumn tommorow ...

Shall We ??.....

Well So much for me sending my daughter to this school ...Sacred Heart in Hamden has a Nun problem there too.

God , Dont punish me .. JESUS was gay and so were at least three of his 12 disciples, according to a Melbourne academic.

Why ??..and OUCH !

This is really unbelievable ...read about Saddam's sicko sex torture of woman, And we havent found this fuck yet ?

Here's some Old School for ya ...Play Duck Hunt .

Ahh, Ancient chinese secret..Read all about how to prepare a cat for consumption

God damn that Viagra works too good , Paul McCartney, 60, and his second wife, Heather Mills, say they are expecting a baby later this year.

Tons and Tons of terrible tounge twisters.

Why would anyone in there right mind want to do this but Tounge splitting is the latest fad, and it may be banned in the US

Rich's Humpday Happenings

This is Ridiculous ...To all our Seattle Readers ...we now know what you go through all the time because it hasnt stopped raining in a week here .

Im not going to do a Contest Picture this week because if I put it up today , you will only have 3 days to quote it up so Im gonna start fresh next week .

Time to burn ...

Connecticut liquor store owners are worried that now liquor stores are open on sundays in NY , It will happen here .

Microsoft Corp. said on Tuesday it has withdrawn a security update for its Windows XP software after discovering that it switched off Internet connections for some of the 600,000 users who downloaded and installed it.

Get yourself a self destructing email address to kill spam completley

Create your very own pile of Dog Shit ...No Really ?!@

Police have busted a substitute middle school teacher from upstate New York who was allegedly caught masturbating in front of a Web cam for a person who he thought was 14-year-old boy.

Are you ready to rock that red dot right off your forehead ?..Meet Iraq's only heavy metal band

Miss the last Lunar Eclipse you say ?...well not anymore ....

Ok study hard people ...The Illustrated Encyclopedia of Sex

Dawn Jenkins isn't in the new Jim Carrey comedy Bruce Almighty, but her phone number is - and that's become a problem.

The pawn shop of the rich and once famous ...At the most exclusive pawnshop in Beverly Hills, NBC4 reporter Doug Kriegel found owner Jean Zimmelman lending money to a formerly wealthy person who suddenly needs cash desperately.

Dont ask me why , just enjoy ...The Random Masturbation Synonym Generator

This is unreal ,Hanoi Susan ....Susan Sarandon took the chance to once again bash America. Following the many others in Hollywood who save their best anti-American attacks for foreign soil, Sarandon said that America is arrogant and that President G.W. Bush is responsible for a country that is more divided than at any other time since the Civil War.

MS paint porn ...check it out

The WWE is using porn stars to promote their "Do you want to be a WWE Diva?' campaign.

See ya tommorow .

Beginning of a short week

Oops. Misdialed numbers may have cost Clay his 'American Idol' title.

A Denver judge has overturned a convicted murderer's death sentence because the jurors consulted the Bible for passages such as an "eye for an eye" during their deliberations. Idiots.

Hey women of Turkey: Be forewarned that Turkish men have a tendency to exaggerate the size of their penis.

What's up with Jenna Bush? Looking kind of dumpy here, no?

Yao Ming is suing Coca-Cola's Chinese subsidiary, accusing it of using his picture without permission on commemorative bottles sold in his hometown of Shanghai. But he is only asking for 12 cents in damages.

Killjoy! Pam Santi of Riverside, California, has complained about a children's book called "Super Diaper Baby," which depicts an infant super hero who battles a giant villainous piece of excrement.

In my effort to bring you the best gift ideas, how about a "Toxic Teddy"?

How long with this take?

This is funny.

Simpsons lovers: What the Springfield townspeople would look like if they had kids.

Give spammers what they're asking for.

Cool! Prototypes of cell phones of the future.

Great photos of the human form.

Rich's Tuesday Tidbits

Well the Contest Winner results are in and we will be havin those in this issue , but Im going to give the winner an extra day for his column because of the holiday , nice guy that I am .

Here is last week's contest photo
( before I get to the winners , I want to tell you a quick funny story about this week's contest picture ....Friday night we were all standing around bullshitting about the DC and other things and somehow the topic got on this week's contest photo. So Hoot( a regular in the forums) being the all - wiseman that he is, sits back and says " I dont care what anyone says that photo has got to be fake " ..WHAT ??? STOP THE PRESSES, HOLD THE PHONE , HOOTIE HAS CRACKED THE CASE !!..It was pretty funny and we all got a good laugh out of it because he was so serious .)

Ok and the winner is Leandroc76 with the quote : "Thumper the Rodeo Rabbit , Buck'em before he breeds"

Second place went to Rleclerc with : "Tying to avoid the paparazzi, Funny Cide's body suit was working until his trainer gave him away!"

Third place went to Carolyn Miller with : " Giddyup, Fluffy."

You will probably see the winner's column on wednesday.

Ok , back to work so let me see if I can put a smile on your face .......

Silly Bible belt ..After receiving a complaint about alleged disgusting toilet humor and bad grammar in "The Adventures of Super Diaper Baby" children's book, school officials have decided to send the book to a committee for review.

This is a tough family to marry into ...AN Indian father cut off the penis of a 41-year-old man as punishment for marrying his daughter

Play Super Mario Bros ..Postal Style

A Gallery of people from around the world auditioning for the Meow Mix commercials ....funny stuff .

Remember my bid the start the "Kill Micheal Moore" group , well this is a start when The website belonging to filmmaker Michael Moore is back online after being hacked this weekend, apparently by someone hoping the director's Academy Award gets taken away.

WTF ????....Lisa Carlson was shot twice in the head and once in the chest. Afterward, a battery-operated sex toy was placed near her body and a pornographic movie was placed in the VCR.

Keeping on this gruesome stuff, This one is not for the weak of stomach so I am going to warn you not to look if you are sqeamish....here is the setup : A biker bimbette decided that she'd rather be rid of her husband, so she coaxed her boyfriend to stop by for an impromptu soiree. As she beguiled her hubby by fellating him while he relaxed on the couch, her boyfriend stealthily wandered behind him and stabbed him in the neck. To celebrate her husband's untimely and expeditious demise, the couple proceded to "get naked", dismember the body, and capture the festivities with their trusty 110 pocket camera. DONT LOOK IF YOU ARE EASILY OFFENDED

If your into that redneck lifestyle, trade em with your friends.

I have to check the Internet better ....THE US Food and Drug Administration mistakenly allowed 1,233 packages of counterfeit Viagra from Belize to enter the United States, which were sold to customers around the country on the Internet.

If anyone figures this out , let me know will ya ?

No Mothers Day gift for this lady ...A TWO-year-old girl was rescued from a locked, running washer at a coin laundry and her mother was arrested after a surveillance tape allegedly showed her putting the child into the machine

Check out Easy Bimbo , the galleries along the left side are where it's at .

In my usual CT Rant , Sen. Joseph Lieberman is for and against tax breaks, depending on which day you ask him...What a tool !

Talk about a real american hero ...A Granny scares off burglar by squeezing his testicles

Rainy holiday stuff

Hey folks. Here are a few more for you on this rainy Memorial Day:

Looking for a new hobby? How about chainsaw carving?

This is cool. The Human Clock. Click on "Clock" in the upper right.

George Bush, Sr. meets some babes at the racetrack.

The CEO of Meow Mix got bitten by a dog.

This is pretty cool: A year in the life of a doodler. Use the book icon to flip pages.

The Smoking Gun is coming to TV.

This is pretty amazing: Domino Artwork.

Here's a ton of ASCII art. You can add one to your email signature to annoy people.

Looking for that perfect anniversary gift? How about Koala Bear Poo Earrings?

Finally, have fun with Googirl. The naked women search engine.

Happy Memorial Day

Happy Memorial Day everyone , Im going to keep it short and sweet today considering most of you will be partying and abusing your livers , not that it's a bad thing .

Stonebridge was as expected on Friday , The same people that came the last time ( with the exception of Peter) came this time , I know some people have told me that they came and couldnt find anyone because the place is so big , So the next one we do , I will organize and set up a meeting place so we can all get it on , DC style .

Respect A Veteran Today .....

Scary Stuff ...Officers and crew of the USS Nassau searched for nine hours for the petty officer who fell overboard.

Here's a role reversal one ...A key player in the murderous 1981 Brinks armored car heist told a parole board that her involvement in radical activities stemmed from her guilt over being white

I know , I know ....A NEW brand of scented condoms aimed at teenagers is raising a stink in Thailand

Cant plant the seed and get your girl pregnant ...Try Ebabies .

And if you dont even have a girl to get pregnant ...Try Webdate , it's free and real cool .

Ok , Im trying sooooooo hard to not make fun ..trying .....trying ...im so weak , just read .

Ok , we already got justtoiletpaper.com , now THIS.

Jeremy Hommes, 18, and Justin White, 17, were charged with shooting a deadly missile at an occupied vehicle, a second-degree felony in Florida... It was a Spitball.

Porn Phones ??..Third-generation mobile phone services operated by Hong Kong conglomerate Hutchison Whampoa will include pictures and video clips from Playboy Enterprises

Doesnt this look like Bjork ?

Have a great Memorial Day and take a minute to remember why we have the day off , OK ?

Some sad news...

For all you former Smith & Barber listeners, I have some sad news to pass along. Frequent caller "Mista Fuel," whose real name was Patrick Foster, passed away on Thursday from injuries resulting from a car accident. He was 39 years old. You may have liked his call-ins, or you may have hated them. But, I knew him in person, and he was a genuinely nice guy.

Rest in peace, Mista Fuel.

Start of a long weekend

Well, tonight's the start of the holiday weekend. Hope you all have an enjoyable 4 days. I am planning to go to Stonebridge tonight, and I hope to see some of you there.

A car drove through the front of a Milford Dunkin’ Donuts shop on Wednesday morning, and Brian Smith got some photos of it right after it happened. Here's one of them.(Thanks, Brian)

Cool: Here's a shot of the Earth as seen from Mars. It was taken by the Global Surveyor spacecraft.

Freak.

Two death row inmates in Utah are scheduled to be executed in June - by firing squad.

Check out these photos of spider webs made by spiders on different drugs.

Overkill: Jeremy Hommes and Justin White have been charged with shooting a "deadly missile" at an occupied vehicle, which is a second-degree felony in Florida. What had they done? They had used straws to fire paper "spit wads."

Bored? How about some scrollbar racing?

A woman who is worried her husband might leave her if she loses her "good looks" has insured her face for £100,000. Call me crazy, but I think she should already be able to collect because she's already unattractive.

Nice top.

Honest local kid: Last fall, Matt Doyle from Deep River found a wallet containing nearly $1,000 cash and he did the honest thing by turning it in. In return, he received a $20 reward from the owner. The other day, he found a handbag containing $40,000 folded in several bank envelopes. Again he turned it in and the money was returned to its rightful owner. Nice to here about honest people, huh?

All you old DOS users will appreciate what you see at www.command.com.

Next time, bring a translator: This kid got a tattoo of Chinese characters that he thought meant "Love, honor & obey." It turned out to mean "At the end of the day, this is an ugly boy."

Check out the sign in the background of this photo of a Women's Rights protest.

These are some unusually large nipples.

Would you use a foot-controlled mouse?

The Stonebridge DC party is TONIGHT !

Tonight's the night , Im not sure what time everyone is getting there but im sure we will all meet sometimes in the night , and you all pretty much know what I look like so find me and I will connect you with everyone else.

Sorry about no column yesterday but last night was out of control to say the least ...It started out so innocent , A 6pm softball game and back to the bar with the team for a couple pitchers and wings and the Yanks game ....turned into midnight with 4 of my teammates and one of his girl friends at stage door johnny's and the girl that came with us got on stage and stripped...Wait , let me repeat this part of the story again ...The chick that WE came with said fuck it and got up on stage and stripped , she has never been to a strip bar from what I heard, and got all naked ...it was sooooo killer !

Anyways , I was too hurting to be looking for websites at 5am after working all night so thats the reason for no column.

Here is the CONTEST PHOTO , get those entries in because this is the last day for those .

Lets swing on a pole and do this .....

The TouchGraph GoogleBrowser is the coolest thing I've seen on the Internet in great long while. Enter a website and watch as it's visually graphed and linked to other sites, based on Google searches.This is what the daily column looks like graphed.

No one ever said New Haven Mayor Destefano was smart ...because the mayor suspects explosive device caused Yale explosion...DUHH.

American Idol was fixed ....Yup it's true.

With a huge gallery surrounding her, and all eyes in golf watching her, Annika Sorenstam turned in a solid performance in the first nine holes of the Colonial tournament, in one of the most anticipated rounds in golf history.

This is why you shouldnt believe everything you read ...

New study reveals Atkins diet is better than lowfat diet

New study reveals Atkins diet is not better than lowfat diet

Little black pervert , baby your much too wierd ....Prince is accused by an ex-girlfriend of being a violent sexual weirdo who made her call him Messiah. Charlene Friend claims the singer threw sex orgies at his mansion and videoed his romps with her and other

Thos crazy new yorkers ....State Sen. Ada Smith (D-Brooklyn) gunned her car through a checkpoint in an Albany parking garage yesterday, narrowly missing a state trooper on the first full day of the stepped-up terror alert

For all you Simpson fans , Make Bart draw whatever you want on his chalkboard.

Read this story about the biggest dump ever found at a house party ..

Finally a little justice for the tobacco industry ...A Florida appeals court on Wednesday threw out a record-setting $145 billion verdict for thousands of Florida smokers against the tobacco industry, saying the case should not have been tried as a class-action lawsuit.

This is the most addicting Internet game ever.

Order some Bad Ass dolls for yourself to make you feel better.

Ohh Cmon already for christ's sake ...The Norwegian Federation for Animal Protection now believes it is wrong for fishing poles being passed out in schools since research shows that fish feel pain.

This cant be good for his portfolio ..Actor Scott Bairstow of the television shows "Party of Five" and "Wolf Lake," and the movie "Tuck Everlasting" has been charged with having sex with a 12-year-old

Dont it suck when your hired to sing the National Anthem and forget the words ( video)

He should have turned into Blade and jacked everyone ....ACTOR Wesley Snipes' $2.6 million home in Florida has been sold for less than half its worth after the star lost a foreclosure battle.

Archaeologists who last year unearthed the remains of a Bronze Age archer at Stonehenge said Wednesday they have found six more bodies near the mysterious ring of ancient monoliths.

Subject of custody battle speaks loudly out of turn, poops on courtroom floor, moons spectators..( thanks Fark)

This guy probably wasnt to popular at the femenism rally , read the yellow sign ..

Pink's pink thong .

Another every so often post

We're back up to Orange Alert.

Jesse Taveras was ticketed for "unauthorized use of a milk crate" in the Bronx yesterday. So what exactly was he doing that was unauthorized? He was sitting on it in front of his own store.

Here's another one: James Galloway of Whitmore Lake, Michigan was found guilty of killing a rattlesnake without a license. He faces up to 90 days in jail and a $500 fine. Why did he kill the snake? Read about it here.

Lovely couple: The mayor of Garrettsville, Ohio, was arrested and charged with drunken driving the other day after he collided with a fence and a tree. When his wife drove up to the scene, she too was arrested for DUI when officers smelled booze on her breath.

What do you do when a body gets stuck in a city's major water supply pipe? Well, in Manila, they just pump more chlorine in the water.

Here's a great way to learn your ABC's. (Thanks Irv)

Remember that ugly "leg lamp" from the movie "A Christmas Story"? Well, you can buy one here.

Okay, this is very gross, but interesting: British scientists have developed a way to test for different gastrointestinal diseases by testing the smell of stool samples. In the future you may need only fart into a special devices to be screened for certain diseases.

This is very geeky, but cool: A USB watch for ultra portable storage.

After baking it for eight hours on a cookie sheet the size of a basketball court, Immaculate Baking Company and a team of 70 volunteers have created a 100-foot, 20-ton chocolate chip cookie, now the world's largest.

Meat for vegetarians!

Check out Whirlyball, a combination of Hockey, Lacrosse, Basketball and Polo played while riding a bumper car.

Here's an interesting adult gift idea, called Floral Derangements.

And another interesting gift idea: Fully baked, ready to eat, 100% real Pie in a Jar.

Bored? Generate your own ransom note. Here's one I did.

Nice mice.

Finally, a mirror of Google, or should I say Elgoog.

A Day Off ..AHHHH

Well a well deserved day off for me because I went on this morning and Peter has a column up so im going to let you enjoy his column and im going to take the day off .

Remember only 3 days till the Daily Column invades Stonebridge, You coming ?

Here is the Contest Photo for this week .

See ya tommorow

Tuesdays Contest Winners column

Sorry about no column today but I feel like a pile of dog poop so Im just going to do the contest winners and the new contest photo and start fresh tommorow , hopefully .

First off , here is last week's contest photo

And the winner is Chef Z with the funny quote : " Hey Doc, I cant seem to get rid of this foul odor between my breasts. It's really affecting my dating! "

There was no column submitted by chef z so there will be no winners column this week , sorry.

Second place went to Happy Reader with : "Nobody could question Doug's commitment when he got the nipple implants in his buttocks."

And third place went to Scythe with : "Getting her out of my mind was tough. Now if I could only get her off my back"!

Another person sent a very funny one in and I deleted it by mistake , It was " Now I know where chocolate milk comes from " ....who ever wrote that great job !!

Here is this week's CONTEST PHOTO and dont forget to send all entries to richie@thedailycolumn.com

Good Luck !!

Ill do a little thing , what the hell ....

Well Ill be a monkeys uncle ...no really ! ...Chimpanzees share 99.4 percent of functionally important DNA with humans and belong in our genus, Homo, according to a recent genetic study.

Awww man ... Millions of people in Manila have been drinking super-chlorinated water this week as the body of a teenager remained stubbornly stuck in a major supply pipe.

It might be just me but I dont see the problem here ? ...Eurovision Song Contest organisers are worried that controversial Russian pop duo Tatu will perform a lesbian publicity stunt on stage. The pair, whose sexually-provocative videos feature them kissing while wearing school uniforms, have promised an "outrageous" show.

This is shitty ....A 29 year old man from Sarpsborg, Norway, is sentenced to sexual therapy after breaking into a kindergarten and stealing soiled diapers.

This might be the Geekiest thing I have ever seen..jesus man , go outside and get some sun .

That Mr Softee is a nut ...With promises of free frozen confections, an ice cream vendor in Jackson lured five teenage girls into his truck, where he allegedly fondled or kissed them

If you were an arcade nut like me , this will bring you back ...games from the 70's, 80's and 90's ..cool stuff .

And I wanna cut loose , Footloose kick off your sunday shoes .....Unable to resolve their row over a disputed field, two middle-aged German farmers staged an impromptu joust on their tractors.

For all of you who havent seen the Matrix yet like me , some animated matrix shorts.

Tennis season is rolling around ...and that means Anna .

See ya tommorow !

Rich's Monday Supercolumn

Whats up everyone , Welcome back to work for most of you

If any of you havent made it up to DICK'S yet in West Haven , make sure you go . I went yesterday for batting gloves ...it is unreal.

Contest Winners tommorow ...look for it

Let's Go ....

The Matrix Reloaded is kicking major ass at the box office .

We just cant get it straight in this god damn state ....the 187 members of the General Assembly debated for about nine hours a $13.7 billion budget plan that was destined to go directly from Gov. John G. Rowland's desk to the trash can.

This is classic stupidity ..The guy who is in prison for throwing a dog into trafiic and killing it is suing the dogs owner for mental anguish ..WTF ?

A Great 3d jet fighter game in shockwave

This is your lucky day ladies ...New England's Gigolo Jess for hire.

IT'S the sex revelation that will leave single women up and down the country speechless. Married women are having hotter sex than they are. Far from growing bored with the same partners, they say they are having more fun in the bedroom than ever.

A Dog too demanding? Allergic to cats? Then how about coming home to a lovable, giant cockroach?

Hate those " 404 error not found" when it comes up on your computer , check this out.

Now this is really for the love 0f the game ...A Golfer who was struck twice by lightning twice during round, plays through.

I guess this is one way to stop it ...Police are moving into crack houses to cut down on drug activity

Right-on righteous rocker Damon Albarn says he wants to record Blur's next album in Baghdad. The dope may need to think this one through.

Deer vs. Durango ..( warning : this is kinda graphic so look with caution)

And we will finish it up with some nice boobies ...tons of pics to look through .

See ya tommorow .

Some Sunday stuff

Oops! A cable company in Manchester New Hampshire accidentally broadcast porn on QVC for a short time on Friday afternoon.

Another oops! A popular teenage in-line skating magazine magazine sold at a Utah Barnes & Noble store included a free DVD that contained hard core porn.

The "Audi-Oh" uses sound to create a uniquely stimulating, infinitely variable vibration. That's right, it's a music powered vibrator.

If you're ever really bored...

A British groom claims that he was unable to consummate his marriage after stag-night strippers pinned him on his back and leapt on to his groin from six feet up a pole.

Here's an interesting article on how the different Presidents have used Air Force One.

Here's an interesting fashion statement.

Local idiots: Three college students were arrested for allegedly staging a kidnapping as a part of a psychology experiment to see how bystanders would react.

Check out these jet-powered vehicles.

Look at this guy's name.

Rich's Weekend RIP

A little something to hold you guys over until Monday ....

WOW , talk about having balls ..President Bush formally kicked off his re-election campaign Friday in the afterglow of victories in Iraq and on Capitol Hill.

An experienced police emergency service lieutenant has been taken off the street and a probe into his judgment has been ordered after his decision to toss a flash bang grenade into the wrong apartment

You say you have always wanted a monkey...well have I got the poop throwing site for you .

For all you old school computer nerds , you will be creaming your cordouroys after seeing this .

The Matrix fans go nuts when the projector breaks during the movie.

UHH DUH ....A teenager in Cape Coral said he fed a neighbor's pet cat to an alligator just to see what the gator would do

Here's some good news that vegetarians can really sink their teeth into: Researchers have developed genetically engineered fruit trees that bear real meat! ..Im going to run out and get my Filet Mignon tree today .

My darling I, I had to much McDonalds baby .....Soul singer Barry White, battling kidney failure since last fall, suffered a new health setback on May 1 with a speech-impairing stroke

Play Paper , Rock , Scissors online ...fun

A GROOM claims he was unable to bonk his bride after stag-night strippers pinned him on his back and leapt on to his groin from six feet up a pole.

Someone is flying over O.J Simpson's house in a helicopter at 4a.m and dropping buckets of golf balls on his roof....HAHAHA , how fucking great is that ?

AHH Cybersex ...I used to love that .

I dont think this guy is getting it at all ....Man ordered to attend domestic violence self-help group tries to hire participants to kill his girlfriend

Here is The History of the Internet .

OOPS .

Ohh god help us all ....Snoop Dogg & Method Man are teaming up to film a remake of "Airplane" called " Soul Plane" .

Farm livin is the life for me ....Yummy

Is Carson Palmer crazy ?..Bengals top draft pick agrees to forfeit $10M signing bonus if he publicly criticizes team

Ok Yall , see ya on monday .

Rich's Friday Wind down

Short one today people , I need some sleep .

L:ast day for entries for the CONTEST PICTURE

Lets get on it ...

Now this is a real nature walk ...Tons of pot found growing in Sequoia National Park.

I guess I picked the wrong week to stop sniffing glue ..CLASSIC LINE . .....Robert Stack dies at 84

If your planning on going to see The Matrix Reloaded this weekend , here are some things you might not know about the film.

WTF ??? ..Film uncovered after the fall of Saddam Hussein shows what seems to be new evidence of brutality under his rule -- three men being executed in gruesome fashion by being blown up with explosives packed around their bodies

I was hesitant about posting this one but what the hell , im a hip guy ...A lot of All-American men are adopting the girly habits of All-American women behind closed doors.

This Soulmate Calculator will calculate the number of American singles you must meet to find your soulmate...try it .

Lots of ADULT PICS ...look ( safe for work)

A director is suing Jennifer Lopez for $3 million, claiming she stole his idea for a film based on the opera "Carmen,"

Everyone should come to the Reef saturday because Scientists found that Forty-seven pints of Guinness contains nearly all your daily nutritional requirements.

This is going to be a short - lived show ....Channel 4 has announced plans to televise a game of Russian roulette in a one-off special featuring illusionist Derren Brown. The channel says the stunt will be aired responsibly, with warnings dissuading viewers from copying it.

Ok , I like my fish tank too , but this is ridiculous !!

Enough is Enough already ....A Brooklyn jury yesterday found that 45 handgun manufacturers and distributors could not be held liable for fueling street violence that victimized blacks.

Now THIS is a Backside !!

We need your help

**ATTENTION ALL DAILY COLUMN READERS **

We need your help, we are starting to get the Daily Column shirts ready and we need a good catch phrase for the back . We have the artwork all ready but only have a couple things in mind for the phrase on the back of the shirt , So Peter & I were talking yesterday and figured our readers are smarter than your average internet surfer so why not open it up to all of you ..Let's see what all of you can come up with..email all phrases to richie@thedailycolumn.com.

Ok now that is done , lets go ....

What a scumbag, Police charged a Little League official yesterday with beating and kicking an 11-year-old boy who rooted against her son's baseball team

Elvis Presley Enterprises Inc. got all shook up when it found out that a small, nonprofit theater was planning a musical tribute to the singer titled "The King of Memphis: The Music of Elvis."...........Elvis Presley Enterprises Inc???????

Mazegirl is annoying and hard ..Die Mazegirl, Die !

Check out this sweet stick flash game Johnny Rocketfingers, no really it is actually really funny.

Well It's down to two , Clay and Ruben are in the finals of American Idol ...Do you really care ?

Dont touch the walls , you'll get zapped .....sorry about all the flash games today .

Ok , Im gonna say it .....2 Monks and a Moose, Happy ?

This one is for all our Pennslyvania DCers , please hunt this girl down and kill her.

A fellow classmate allegedly gnawed off a student's ear, but the suspect claims it was just in self-defense...Mike Tyson is gonna be jealous !

Good job on the contest entries this week so far , keep em coming !

New money

Sorry for the on again, off again posting. I start feeling better, then the pain gets bad again. Holding my damn right arm up to type is a pain. Bear with me. I'll be back to regular posting as soon as I can.

Okay, let's see what's going on...

There's new money on the way. The Department of the Treasury will be issuing new colorful bills this fall. There's a really well done demonstration of the new bills here.

Yummy. An Applebee's Restaurant customer in Iowa found a lizard head in her salad.

17-year-old high school student Mary Loeffler wanted her self-portrait to make a statement about freedom and women's bodies. So, painted a life-size portrait of herself wearing a bright red dress with her left breast exposed. An hour after she hung it up at school, administrators asked her to take it down, because it was "not appropriate for a school." What do you think?

This is cool: It's called an "Airzooka" and it shoots a powerful, concentrated blast of air that can be felt 20 feet away.

If you weren't a US Citizen, could you pass this short version of the test to become one?

Yeah, he won't ever regret having done this.

Check this out: This guy put a fish tank in the top of a full tower case.

This is fun: Kind of like the old game Operation, it too requires a steady hand.

Here's one way to pick up a woman, that is, as long as you're looking for a gold-digger.

Rich's Humpday Happenings

Welcome to humpday everyone , It's good to see Peter back and let's hope his pain goes away so we can have him at full strength, but I was talking to him yesterday and he said he would be at Stonebridge on the 23rd if he had to come in a stretcher..will you be there ??

Entries for the CONTEST PICTURE are starting to flow in , keep em coming .

Lets do this .....

Get into the mind of an (allegedly) real PSYCHOPATH -- a Brooklyn man who put out a fanzine ("Singin' Dose Anti-Psychotic Blues") that was tracked by the FBI (according to Frank) in the early 1990s. ...ya something to read on the can, huh ?..( Thanks Spunky)

Here is something I got that seems to be working so far , It's a webcam site with tons of people on it ...free ?

Let's kick this robbery up a notch ...BAM !!......Thieves use curry powder to rob victims .

The Hitchhiker is very confusing at first but very fun once you learn how to do it , it's a interactive text adventure , try it .

This brings back some old memories ..Play Pitfall ( remember this one?)

A key piece of evidence in the Laci Peterson case will be a hair reportedly found on pliers found aboard his boat, according to NBC .

Im going to start the campaign to "Kill Michael Moore " , anyone with me ??.......Friday night on HBO far-left crank/movie producer Michael Moore claimed, during an interview on Costas' show, that the Bush administration “absolutely” knows where Osama bin Laden is located and doesn't go after him “because he's funded by their friends in Saudi Arabia!”

A cool band website that makes no sense at all but has alot of stuff to click on.

What the hell is this world coming to when this happens ?...Oreo cookies should be banned from sale to children in California, according to a lawsuit filed by a San Francisco attorney

Check out Unreal- x for your one stop erotic comics stop .( technically safe for work depending on how cool your boss is ?)

AHH , Heather ....gotta love her.

Do you feel lucky punk , well do ya ??......NYPD suspends cop who handed inmate loaded gun and said, "Okay, now what are you going to do?"

Now you know you have problems when you are the guy who crashes, flips his car, wanders away from accident, falls off cliff .

For all you wanna be chefs, here are your recipe guides.

See ya tommorow .

Rich's Tuesday Tidbits

Hey Ya"ll , We are still on for May 23rd at Stonebridge restaurant in Milford for the second annual TDC bash , I will be bringing my Digital so make sure you come down to get yourself on the DC .

Here is this week's CONTEST PICTURE ..Good Luck.

And away we go ....

WTF ?? ...A woman accused of fatally beating two of her sons with rocks spent Mother's Day sobbing and muttering in a jail cell.

Just a little reminder that computers run this world ...Security guards smashed their way into an official limousine with sledgehammers on Monday to rescue Thailand's finance minister after his car's computer failed.

I dont know how useful this one is but its funny ...How to communicate with a deaf hooker.

For all you guys who love tall woman , have I got the woman for you ...say hello to Heather Haven.

Rock musician Noel Redding, best known for his stint as the bassist for the Jimi Hendrix Experience, was found dead Sunday at his home in Ireland of unknown causes

Look at this forum , and you think our forums are sick ....read this one .

See and you thought once you left school you would never use math again , well im here to prove you wrong .

A Woman stalked for eight years tells stalker, "Sit down, we need to talk"..good for her.

This isnt good news for me ....New York smoking ban has caused 50 percent drop in business, bars closing

Trenton Thunder team mascot 'Chase the Golden Thunder' retrieves Derek Jeter 's bat after Jeter hit a single against the New Haven Ravens at Waterfront Park in Trenton, N.J. Sunday, May 11, 2003.

What an ass ...A woman bought herself a $250,000 winning Mother's Day lottery ticket after her husband didn't buy her a gift.

Its Charlies Angels ...Trailer Park Style

Rich's Contest Winning Column

Hello and Welcome back , I hope everyone's weekend was cool . I went to one of the CRAZIEST stags on friday you are ever gonna imagine , totally, totally insane .....7 girls , a chair leg , a wine bottle and a cup full of ice is all im gonna say....... discuss.
I was soooo hanging on Saturday night , ask buffy and barfly ......they will tell you!

I figured we would do the Contest Winner a little early considering the winners colyumn is all ready to go , so with that said lets start off with last weeks contest picture .

And the winner this week is XIONPETE with the quote : "The very small winner's circle at the 1st annual Ugly lesbian parade"
Pete's column will follow mine so be onthe lookout for that .

Second place went to VIDEO GAME EXCHANGE with : "Even after being examined by over 530 psychiatrists, no one could figure out why Shelly and Pat insisted on cutting their hair short and letting their bushes grow like weeds."

And third place went to RLECLERC with : "We got so drunk...we mixed up the Nair bottle with the Rogain! Good thing that 70s look is in! "

Thanks to all for your entries .

If you didnt win last week , try again this week ...here is this weeks CONTEST PHOTO and send all entries to richie@thedailycolumn.com

We need a laugh or two , huh ?........

Ever hear the saying "you cant fight city hall ?? ....well apparently this guy never did .

I know getting older is a bummer , but this study says that personality improves with age ....thank god !

You think your a grown up junior ??....Most Americans believe someone isn't grown up until age 26, probably with a completed education, a full-time job, a family to support and financial independence, a survey said

For all of you who are jobless right now .....Position Available: Interpreter, must be fluent in Klingon.

Play some killer Strip Poker .

You have to see this ..Porn Doodles, I think it is real cool .

One week after the Kentucky Derby, Churchill Downs announced they are examining a picture of the race,some believe shows the jockey carrying something other than his whip..Too bad , soo sad .

A 17-year-old girl was killed after she tried to slide down the railing of a staircase inside a museum, lost her balance and fell..thats screwed !

A woman was arrested for dousing herself with perfume, spraying the house with bug killer and disinfectant, and burning scented candles in an attempt to seriously injure her chemically sensitive husband..UMMM ??..Chemicaly Sensative ??

A Florida nudist colony is planning what it's calling the first-ever webcast of a nude tennis tournament. For a fee of $10-$13, Internet surfers can go to this website and watch on demand the two-hour tournament after it's played Sunday.

The bills must be real late ..Rent my Chest !

This is site that has been around but for you who havent seen it , It was a photographer who died Sept 11th , they found his cameras in the rubble and retrieved the pictures from it and this is what they found ..sad and amazing all in the same thing .

One of the BEST ASSES
I have seen ....EVER !

Xionpete's Winning Column

Xionpete went a little different route ...instead of doing a traditional column , he used it as a forum to get some points across ..Good For You !!!

Here is Pete's Column :

"First alleluia, and Meka Leka Hi!!! Send my crazy homie a shout out!!! This Means You Darnoc69!! And one not so good shout out to My man, for this purpose, we shall call him "Neo," for his uncanny ability to dodge all responsibility. I am sure he knows who he is. Spare him the embarrassment of being singled out as one complete asshole.

I really cannot fill this column with the links that I want, because besides "The Daily Column" and Yahoo, the isn't really much else good on the Internet. Most of the stuff i find is pure luck or only attained after hours of searching Google and Ask.com.
Why can't it be just where i need it? Damn you favorite places getting lost in the great computer crash of 2003!!

I do have one thing to really say, that i think is important. I was at the peace rally in NYC. I am not sure how many TDC readers went, but it was pretty spur of the moment me going down there. I was headed there anyway to see the excellent Joni Mitchell tribute that was happening, and i only heard about the rally on the radio of the cab i took from Grand Central to the show. Either way i left the show and went to the village to see what was really happening. Thanks to a very nice girl i met along the way. Anyway, when i got there it was unbelievable. SO many people gathered and so many were there i thought for such the wrong reason. Everybody wanted to have their say.
Peace, the idea of peace, is what really brought me down there. I wanted to see what the actual "peace movement" was. It was interesting. I didn't hear peace. I didn't see peace. I saw alot of people panhandling their cause, trying to influence the people that were there for the real reasons. Some were buying it. I got asked for a donation for a socialist group. "I don't think so" i said as i threw the pamphlet back to the table. So happy i got out of there when i did. Which is when the Palestinians were parading right in front of the Israelis and some asshole on the side yelling "Suicide Bombers For Peace."
It was good to see so many people in one place. Fighting for a cause. It would have been so much nicer to see them all fighting for the same cause. You cannot get your point across when you are burning a flag. That was the biggest disappointment. Hopefully the dumb fucks that burned them read this column, or know someone who does. What Have you accomplished? When you have the right to demonstrate and you can get a crowd together, behind you, why fuck it up with your ridiculousness? You disgust me.
This war is not over. People are getting killed everyday. Our people, their people. The time has not past for all of us to stick together and be one again. One like we were after Sept. 11th. Unified, like the name United States suggests.

Hang your flags back out."

Back to business

Okay, here we go...

I watched the press conference yesterday of the 27-year-old climber who amputated his own arm that was pinned by a boulder. He spoke very calmly about how he broke his wrist bones and then he cut his arm off with a dull "multi-purpose" tool. Finally, he rappelled down a 60-foot cliff and walked six miles down the canyon.

This is cool: A "bionic" eye consisting of an artificial retina has restored partial vision to three blind people.

Nice top.

Microsoft has acknowledged a security flaw in its Passport service that left 200 million accounts vulnerable to hackers and thieves.

Oops!

Honest, but not too bright: A 29-year-old school bus driver from Georgia called the police to report someone had stolen four "dime bags" of marijuana from him.

Nice top.

Thinning of the herd: An 18-year-old tried to imitate a stunt from "Jackass" by jumping into a pool from the roof of a five-story condo. He missed the water.

Nice cleavage. (and lots of it)

This poor kid filmed himself doing a Star Wars skit and forgot to keep the tape after returning the camera.

All of these pets have one thing in common: They're all freeze-dried.

Nice top.

An Israeli policeman responding to a rowdy bachelorette party received an unexpected welcome at the door when revelers mistook him for a stripper and began to take off his clothes.

Nerd gym.

Finally, the top 77 things NOT to say during sex.

Rich's Friday Rants ...

The weekend is upon us so lets go out in style , huh ?

I hope everyone got a chance to see that episode of PUNK'D with Britney on it , if you didnt im sure MTV will be playing it 2,000,000 times this weekend , sit down and watch it ..you wont be dissapointed !

Last day for contest entries , here is the CONTEST PHOTO again .

Along with this weeks winner getting to do his or her own column in the DC they will recieve An "ASSHOLE OF THE WEEK" award they can have sent to anyone they want , generously donated by Marc & Darren of Justtoiletpaper.com, here is more about it ...winner will recieve more info when they are notified by me .

GOOD LUCK TO ALL ~~!!

We are ready , I am ready ...Were ready .....

The Matrix Reloaded, the follow-up to the 2000 hit The Matrix, is possibly the most eagerly-awaited film of 2003 was premired in LA on wendsday .

UHH DUH ? ....More than half of the city's registered voters say building the world's tallest building at the World Trade Center site is a "bad idea," according to a poll released Thursday.

These croutons are chewy ?? ..A man is suing McDonald's after allegedly biting into a piece of already chewed gum in a salad.

Welcome to the NERD GYM , why go outside when you can do everything in front of your monitor ?

Everyone , Mix and Max .

For all you PayPal users ...It could soon be easier to buy adult videos at your local sex shop than through the Internet. PayPal will stop taking payments for most adult-themed merchandise over the next five weeks.

Ohh , If I were only a gearhead ...aaarrgghh , so fast , want to touch the heiny !

What happened to Saturday morning cartoons?..remember conjuction junction , I hanker for a hunk of cheese, im just a bill ??

Here is some major boobage ( 600 pics)...fella's enjoy

How fucking true is this ....A Man given 72-hour pass from prison asks to go back to cell after less than 24 hours with wife

Aston Kutcher told Rolling Stone in its new issue that Jenna and Barbara Bush were drinking at his house, even though they were underage. He also implies that he caught them smoking pot with a friend of his...SNITCH !

The name's OUT , Passed Out . ....Former James Bond star Roger Moore was recovering in hospital Thursday after collapsing on a Broadway stage.

This is pretty cool ...They way we read our newspapers and books is about to change for ever. Scientists say they've finally cracked "electronic paper" - an ultra-thin screen that can be bent, twisted and even rolled up - yet still show sharp readable text.

You wanna join the British Secret Service ?? .. lets see if you got what it takes ...go for it !

Not mine, but One guys rant ....One of the more popular “news” sites on the World Wide Web is AlterNet.Org. According to its own website, “AlterNet.org is a project of the Independent Media Institute, a nonprofit organization dedicated to strengthening and supporting independent and alternative journalism.” The problem is of course that AlterNet.Org. is nothing but Leftist Dogma, which is just plain garbage or intended to “enlighten” Americans to the horror of American imperialism and support of terrorists...

Well, I thought I was back

Hi folks. I thought I was back the other day, but as it turned out my recovery wasn't gonna be as fast as I thought. Richie came to visit me and I probably seemed okay, but for the next few days all hell broke loose.

First, the intense pain set in as the self-administered morphine pump was disconnected. So, they adjusted the meds until the pain, (and my normal state of consciousness) went away. I was pretty fucked up for a few days.

Then, the doctors noticed part of my lung was still not fully inflated, so they had to "jiggle" the chest tube around inside my chest, while I was awake, to get it to expand that area. (Now that was fun.)

Finally, on Saturday, it was time to remove the chest tube, which, thanks to some well placed lidocaine injections, was not as unpleasant as I had expected. Then, a quick x-ray to see if the lung was stable and I was on my way home.

Home, sweet home. No doctors, no nurses, no emergency services. Things were looking up. I spent the rest of the day and night in bed. So far so good. Seven a.m. rolls around and I slowly got out of bed and walked to the bathroom, being careful not to wake Laurie since she spent most of the night awake, worried about me.

Taking a pee worked fine, so I then brushed my teeth. Suddenly everything was spinning around, and I was feeling very faint. I remember yelling out to Laurie and next thing I knew, she was kneeling over me where I had fallen, on the bathroom floor with my back against the tub.

Somehow she got me to my feet, and she said I kind of sprinted down the hall back toward the bedroom, bounced off the wall, and then whacked into the attic doorway knob, breaking it off (one of those glass ones) with some part of the operation part of my back. No blood, and nothing else was leaking out of me so she got me back into bed where I stayed asleep for the next several hours. (With her by my side)

She set a new rule: I wasn't allowed to do anything without her right next to me. (Actually that was already the rule, but this time I would actually follow it.) After checking with the doctors, all seemed okay, so I just stayed in bed the rest of the day and night.

The next day, everything was fine until I moved the wrong way in bed and there was an amazingly horrible pain in my side. I started to have trouble breathing again, so it was back to the hospital. Turned out I had scraped the inside of my lung with the edge of one of the ribs the surgeons had to chip away during my surgery. So, a few more painkillers and it was back home with orders to be move more slowly and carefully. And thats where I am now.

I can't really hold my right arm up that well, so typing is difficult. I'm writing this in bed with a Pocket PC and posting it wirelessly through my router. (That's also why there are no links.) Anyway, I'm gonna try to use a sling to type a real column tomorrow. Sorry for taking so long to get back to doing TDC, but I have to kind of take it slow. As soon as I mend a little futher, everything will be back to normal.

I want to thank all of you again who have sent well-wishes to me via email and via the discussion board. I just checked my email for the first time in several days, so sorry for the delay. I also want to thank my family, who sent us enough meals for the next 2 weeks. Thanks to Geoff Fox too, for lending me his laptop to use in the hospital. Lastly, I want to thank Richie for keeping everything here going. I owe you big time, my friend.

Okay, pain pill is kicking in, and I'm fading. G'nite and I'll see you tomorrow.

Deep Thursday Thoughts from Rich

What's up everyone ..only one more day for contest entries and as of right now we only have 2 entries so far , maybe it was the email but 2 is not too good right now .

We got a DJ dance party at the reef saturday night , come bust a nut like denny terio , you know you wanna .

Ok , and away we go ..

Bad News for all you smokers ...The non smoking bill in CT has passed its last hurdle and will be in effect by next April at the latest .

A federal judge Wednesday awarded nearly $104 million in damages to the families of two victims of the Sept. 11 attacks...this is just opening up a huge can of worms !

This is for all you AOL users , do you want to have all your instant messages sent to your Cellphone ...click here .

Now this is a way to go , jesus ....A young man died a gruesome death in Empangeni when he put his neck to a butcher's bandsaw in the store in a bizarre apparent suicide as shoppers watched .

NICE, why cant I be at things like this ? ....A "powder puff" football game between seniors and junior girls in suburban Chicago turned ugly when older girls dumped paint and human feces onto the underclassmen, and five girls landed in the hospital with injuries.

Well if your a member of the forums , I was talking about Britney Spear's appearance on MTV's PUNK'D and how she was hanging out of her shirt , way out ...I had the link and they took it down this morning , thats too bad cause they were real ,real good ....but make sure you catch this week's episode of PUNK'D to see for yourself .

The Who guitarist Pete Townshend has been cautioned by police for accessing child pornography on the internet. Scotland Yard said The Who star would be placed on the sex offenders' register for five years.

A place for some great Computer Wallpaper ..The Cosmos.

David Williams' gambling addiction cost him his life savings — almost all of it dumped into the slot machines at Casino Aztar in Indiana. Williams decided to take action. He sued the casino.

Britney vs Bill Clinton ...The brawl to end it all .

A rare and dangerous squid with eyes the size of dinner plates and scores of razor-sharp hooks to snag its prey has been caught by fishermen off Antarctica

This is way cool , Get your own virtual apartment .

Read some real funny bathroom graffiti ...I love sitting there reading this stuff .

So you say you have always wanted to be Sonny Bono ..well here's your chance .

HAHA ...Welcome to ZOMBO.Com ...

Some serious Celebrity Camel Toe ...I like , I like alot !

A Big Ups to Peter ( the human pinball ) on keeping us updated on his progress , we all miss ya and hope to see you back real soon !

Rich's Humpday Happenings

Hmm , I cant figure out what the problem is with my DC email so just send all entries to my Aol address posted in my last column, sorry for the inconvienence...But I just got a couple so try my DC address first .

Here is the CONTEST PHOTO

Here is my picture and article from the Advocate for all you lazy asses who didnt pick it up yet ...Thanks again all !

Lets get it on ......

WTF ?? ...one of the world's biggest record companies, facing rampant online piracy, are quietly financing the development and testing of software programs that would sabotage the computers and Internet connections of people who download pirated music

This is pretty cool ,See if you can tell where these letters are from ...I did pretty good .

A top Iraqi scientist known as 'Chemical Sally' has been taken into custody, US officials say they suspect she has information about a banned biological weapons program.

Only in CT ...The book Kelly Woodward recently returned to the Vernon Public Library was due back on May 3 — that’s May 3, 1909.

Saddam's son may have made off with more than 1 billion US dollars..US officials say they cannot confirm reports that Qusay Hussein coordinated the money's removal from Iraq's Central Bank.

I dont know why you would ever need this but here is the Ultimate Pay Phone Directory .

For you old school wrestling fans ...Miss Elizabeth is dead and her man Lex Luger is in deep shit , but not for murder .

This might be a good thing because Rangers Find Arm That Climber Amputated.

Do you woman hate the word VAGINA ?.. well here are tons of other names you can call your private areas .

There has got to be a better way to get high than this ....OUCH .

Ok, Is there anything better than a Hot Latin Naked Model ??.. I think not !

Ohh baby , they are next !! ..The French government secretly supplied fleeing Iraqi officials with passports in Syria that allowed them to escape to Europe, The Washington Times has learned. The passports are regarded as documents of the European Union and have helped the Iraqis avoid capture.

Im sure this guy hated this ....An Israeli policeman responding to neighbors' complaints about a rowdy hen party received an unexpected welcome at the door when revelers mistook him for a stripper and began to take off his clothes and stroke him.

Ahh more 80's games ...Play Pac-Man ( remember the song PacMan fever ?)

Here's a tip for all you EBAY sellers , If you are selling something ..make sure you arent naked when taking a picture of something that you can see a reflection in .

My DC email isnt working ??

For some reason my Daily Column Email address isnt working , until I can figure it out ...use my AOL address ....FOWL444@AOL.COM

Sorry for the confusion, I dont understand it either yet ?

Rich's Contest Winners Column

Well let me start off by saying this weeks winners column is a thing of beauty , this guy really put some time and effort into his column and took the " make the column as long or as short as you want " line to a whole new realm but his column is something to rewarded.

I was going to do a column today but why ruin Grant's great column by adding one myself so I will just put the winners down and let his column speak for me today ..Great Job Grant , this is how it is supposed to be done !!

Ok , lets start off with last weeks contest picture in case you forgot .

And the winner was Grant with the quote : "The monica lewinsky urinal hits bathroom show rooms later this year, unfortunately the one pictured does not come with the optional cigar holder."

Second place went to Darnoc69 with : " Spy Photo from Mick Jagger's Guest Bathroom"

And third place went to JackD1979 with : "the rolling stones gold tooth marketing campaign finally exceeds KISS in sales."

Look for the winners column right after this one , Again Great Job by everyone this week .

And here is the NEW CONTEST PHOTO and send all entries to richie@thedailycolumn.com

See ya tommorow .

Grant's Fantastic Winning Column

Well it is an honor and a privilege, I thought I would open this thread with something witty, but it looks like I shot my load on the picture of the week…

I finally registered for the TDC forum, as grant… aren’t I creative? I have been visiting this site for a few months, I guess it is time for me to participate. I must congratulate Rich and Peter (hope you feel better soon) on a great site, it really does make me laugh a lot!

I have decided that this column should be all about me :D Rich was silly enough to pick me as the winner, and I am a firm believer that we all should pay for our mistakes… Rich said “Your column can be as long or as short as you want it to be and can say whatever you want it to ..It's yours.” let the marathon column begin!

I was born in Manchester, CT on a chilly spring night in March of 1974… ok, maybe I don’t need to tell you everything. I currently reside in the wonderful city of Phoenix, AZ! I can’t wait for my annual pilgrimage to visit the relatives in CT this June.

More about me, I know you are all excited. Here is my website You will find many great things about, well you guessed it, me :D as well as my wife, dog and two cats…

Two of my favorite hobbies are drinking and playing with my PC, so with the help of some friends, we have combined the two for Geekfest

I also help run another gaming site

And then there is the third love of my life, food . I write reviews for them, well, I wrote one, so I guess I write review for them.

I just recently purchased a 2004 Nissan Maxima SE . The reason there are so many pictures is because some of the geeks over at Maxima wanted to see them.

BTW, if you are going to buy a car, there are two things you need to remember. 1) Be a total dick! This is the only time you are going to buy something from a business where they will try to screw you into paying too much. They will lie, they will cheat, so you need to do it better. A great site for car buying tips is HERE . Feel free to ask me any questions you may have regarding the car buying process. I am really good at it, cause I have no problems being the biggest dick. My favorite thing to do is email a dealer about his quote, and CC all the other dealers in on it :D

I have never read Bully Magazine before, but it looks like they got their Jack Ass award right . I feel the need to add that I hate Michael Moore. I think this may be a picture of him .

Very cool geek site . I am a geek you know. :D

These are two of my favorite websites, HERE and HERE. They are great for getting good deals on things.

Ok, this one you may not want to open at work. But you will want to write the address down and check it out when you have a few minutes, and a few extra tissues :D

If you use Internet Explorer and you want to see it crash, click here ... Don’t say I didn’t warn you…

The best blonde joke ever!

Nice seats

They are rich and hot, two of the three things needed to be a perfect girlfriend. This page will tell you when they will have secured the third leg of the potential girlfriend triple crown. :D

Ok, I have taken up enough of this column. I do want to end it on a bit of a more serious note. Here are two websites that are very near and dear to me.

This a great place to learn about Multiple Sclerosis, which is something that I was diagnosed with last year.

This page is dedicated to finding a cure for Hodgkin’s Disease, which is something that my wife was diagnosed with and kicked the shit out of in 2001 :D

Ok, I leave you with some great buns-

Here

Uhhhh

Got drool?

Ok, since I love you guys, I took a look at this site and I noticed that this person linked all the pictures back to the page. So, I took the time to pick apart the source code and give you this list of picture. Since I didn’t want this to be a huge list here, I put the links on this page
:D

Ladies, since I love you too, I didn’t post any pictures of my self.

Thanks,

Grant from Phoenix

Richs Monday Supercolumn

Welcome back everyone , we finally had a pretty nice weekend and I hope everyone took full advantage of it .

No screwing around , lets get right to it it ....

Dude give it up , will ya ? ...A lone protester stood outside a sold-out Dixie Chicks concert Saturday night during the band's first appearance in Florida since a member criticized President Bush over the war with Iraq

What a lucky son of a bitch ....LIZ HURLEY is well known for her public displays of passion and affection for new love Arun Nayar. But the lingering kiss goodnight and close embrace she gave him at 35,000ft went too far.

First-Ever Nude Flight Departs From Miami. When this flight reaches cruising altitude, passengers take off more than their seat belts. They get naked.

Im not sure if any of you know but there is supposed to be a naked sex video circulating of Jenna Bush from a party at Yale , and Larry Flynt has offered up 1 million dollars to get his hands on it

Just so angry all the time ...Incensed fans walked out of Pearl Jam's concert Tuesday after lead singer Eddie Vedder impaled a mask of President Bush on a microphone stand, then slammed it to the stage.

This picture just blows my notion that all boobs are good boobs ...DAMN !

HAHA , this is , well im not really sure how to put this ......ummm .....Ill give you the first line from the page .." WELCOME TO MY HOMEPAGE , I KISS YOU " .....enjoy !

I have to start camping more ...

Now this is what you call hard up ...she better have hooked up after this .

So what celebrity and you would be perfect together ?... Find your perfect romantical celebrity match here .( I ended up with Rachel Stevens , email yours)

Order Ghettopoly ..Buying stolen properties, pimpin hoes, building crack houses and projects, paying protection fees and getting car jacked are some of the elements of the game

Ok , I usually dont post things this graphic but the guys need one once and a while ...Fellas , Lesbian Love Boat ( Not safe for work) 135 pics here.

Three boys escaped Monday and were found wandering barefoot on the street. They told authorities that their mother, Rowles, and her partner had locked them in a closet, beat and starved them, and forced them to eat animal feces. Several of the children had apparently been locked up since Valentine's Day...I say do the same to the mother .

Rich's Weekend Rare Column

Ok , now Peter usually posts a weekend column but since he is out of commision for a while , The torch is passed to me for a bit .

Let me just tell you all that this is the 3rd year in a row that I won the Kentucky Derby , another $580.00 ...and you all can just call me "Richie the Greek" !

Lets do this weekend style ...

Can you fuckin imagine this ??....A climber who amputated his own arm with a pocketknife to free himself from a narrow, remote canyon in Utah is still alive.

Ahh the 80's ...Play Q-BERT

Here is a tough guy ..Sheriff's deputy pepper sprays 12-year-old girl for jaywalking

Why cant I think of things like this ever ...Phony National Security Agents having young women strip for security reasons

Can you figure out the 6 degrees of Arnold ?? .. I couldnt !

Im going to say 4 words ...ready ??? .. GIRLS OF MARDI GRAS !!

Cannonball Run my ass ...This is the Gumball 3000 !

Interesting ...Saddam's last (unreleased) videotape shows him to be exhausted. Was also shot two days after U.S. strike on government compound

More than 100 men and women gathered in famously liberal San Francisco this weekend for what organizers said was the city's second annual public ''Masturbate-a-Thon.''

See , I told you Daveyboy ....Cannabis could be a "major health hazard" that kills up to 30,000 people every year in Britain, doctors report today.

These have to be the most perfect Breasts in the whole world .

Rich's Friday Stuff

It looks like the next DC party on May 23rd is coming along nicely, For all of you who dont know ...We are having another DC party at Stonebridge in Milford on May 23rd , for more info go to the forum called "May 23rd" .

This is the last day for entries for the CONTEST PHOTO , make sure you get those in for your chance to write your very own column.

Everybodys working for the weekend .....ahh loverboy ...

More than a dozen Saddam Hussein lookalikes have auditioned for the role of the former Iraqi leader in a forthcoming show in London's West End.

So you think your good in the sack huh ? ...well check out World Sexual Records to see if you can keep up .

What a tough guy ...Houston Astros shortstop Julio Lugo was arrested after Wednesday night's game, accused of assaulting his wife in the parking lot of Minute Maid Park just before the game

Teen lesbian sensations TATU ....All sexed up .

This guy probably got murdered in school as a kid ....just murdered.

Remember the old "Simon" game that used to piss you off as a child? Well, here's a version with an adult twist. Requires sound.

The Fast and the Furious ...Lego style.

The Montana cabin where convicted Unabomber Theodore Kaczynski lived during his deadly spree of bombings will be destroyed at his request.

Play Dj Fu Wax Attack ....Yo !

A good tip for all you smokers ...How to Smoke in airplane bathrooms.

I'm back

Well, I guess the worst is over. I had my surgery on Monday, then I spent Tuesday in ICU and yesterday, (Wednesday) it was back to a normal room. So far so good, although it has been a painful experience.

After surgery, I started on small, steady flow of morphine, along with a self-controlled, "on-demand" dosage. That became too much by Tuesday night, (I was getting way too fucked up) so I asked them to take me off of the morphine altogether. So, they switched me to Percocet and Toradol.

I ended up having a thoracotomy. Basically, they made an incision about 5 inches down from my armpit, running from just below my right nipple to the center of my back. Here's a graphic photo of the left side version of he operation. Once they opened me up, they removed a bunch of "blebs," (which caused the collapse), scrapped the lining of the lung so it would heal while adhered to the chest wall, and closed me back up.

It hurts to type for a long time, so I'm gonna check out for now. I'll try again tomorrow.

Rich's Thursday Shortie

First off , I went up to see Peter yesterday and he is doing alot better (everything except for his hair , Yikes !) . He is in good spirits and should be back in the swing anyday now.

For all of you who voted for me in the "Advoctes Best Of" poll , The issue came out today ..I am on page 52 , check it out !

Ok a short one today cause richie is sleepy ....

This is a good one ...Investors embraced shares in the sex industry group The Daily Planet Ltd today, with the brothel more than doubling its value on its stock market debut.

Good News ...Pakistani authorities have captured a man accused of playing a leading role in the Sept. 11 attacks and the bombing of an American warship in Yemen, a catch President Bush called a ''major, significant find'' ...

The connecticut State Senate easily approved a bill late Wednesday to ban smoking in all restaurants and bars, as well as all work places with more than five employees...I told you this was going to happen !

Are these people engaged in sex or doing something else? You decide!

I cant decide whether this is funny or disturbing ...Satan for president ?

Hot and Crazy ...what a combination !! ...Elle Macpherson lines her baby's cot with lead to shield him from airplane cosmic rays

Coke had to pull Robot with swaztika's all over it ...Umm hello , reality ???

Punch a celebrity , Smack a polititian , beat a rock star ...all here for you .

Ok , nighty night !