Wednesday quickie

In the utterly ridiculous department: Janet Jackson was bleeped by censors while talking to TV talk show host David Letterman — for saying “Jesus”. Since when is "Jesus" one of the seven dirty words?

A motorist injured in a crash lay paralyzed in the middle of a freeway with a broken neck for 36 hours before he was rescued.

When Mark Walters received a $2,500 bill from his long-distance carrier, Denver-based Qwest, he figured it had to be a mistake. It was, and it was his daughter's boo-boo.

A man falling from a plane caused a power outage Monday when he hit electrical lines at a Santee mobile-home park, knocking out power in the area.

What the hell is this?

I'm sure there's a simple explanation as to how it works, but check out this guess your number thing.

Want a free car? Check this out.

Internet giant AOL has ratcheted up the war against unsolicited e-mail with a publicity-grabbing coup - an online raffle of a spammer's seized Porsche.

A Cambodian man cut off his penis when he said he was visited by four hungry spirits in a dream and he had no chicken or duck to offer them.

A spring break celebration among friends ended tragically when a UC Berkeley student apparently drank himself to death during a contest to see who could consume the most alcohol.

A Newport News woman charged with a felony for receiving oral sex in a car is challenging a state law that prohibits certain types of sex between consenting adults.

Rich's Humpday Happenings

A real bad ATV accident in Derby yesterday left one young man dead and another in critical condition . Me & the wife were talking about it and I dont think it is all that bad that a young man has such a thing as long as he uses it wisely and my wife disagrees because she doesnt think a 15 year old has the common sense to do such a thing and thinks peer pressure would play a big part in his decisions , what do you think ?

Starting in July , The Statue of Liberty is going to be back in buisness . It has been closed since Sept 11th, 2001.

Martha Stewart's milkshake brings all the boys to the (prison) yard.

Teresa Kemp says she's been unable to sleep soundly for 22 years, still haunted by the image of her lover holding a man's severed head in his hand.

I know , I know your week wouldnt just be complete without your fix of Bloody Midgets ..so this is for you .

State police have charged a 15-year-old Latrobe girl with child pornography for taking photos of herself and posting them on the Internet.

Did Scientology come between Tom Cruise and Penelope Cruz? A source who knows the couple, but has not talked with either since they announced that they were no longer an item, says that Cruz was ''dragging her feet'' when it came to converting to Cruise's controversial religion.

The Animal Mating Zone. I think MyTaint just maxxed out all his credit cards

A 20-year-old man confessed to a half dozen burglaries, saying he felt guilty after seeing the movie "The Passion of the Christ."

Dc'er Johnny Wad writes: "Oh SNAP! This is the craziest thing I've seen. Yeah it just looks like some gymnast at first, but just watch it all the way through. And ignore the crappy Eminem music."

Fuck the FCC - Mancow sues Critic right back .

I couldn't watch this whole thing. I don't really know why I'm posting it. If you value your time at all, you probably shouldn't click this link

U.S. Democratic presidential candidate John Kerry, who will undergo minor shoulder surgery on Wednesday, faces a politician's worst nightmare while recovering -- no shaking hands

Rich's Tuesday Tacklebox

I got this in a email from a buddy of mine and thought it was funny , and if your not from CT and dont get it ...Im sorry .

Mattel recently announced the release of Limited Edition Barbies for the Connecticut market:

Darien Barbie - This princess Barbie is only sold at Neiman's. She comes with an assortment of Kate Spade handbags, a Lexus SUV, a long-haired dog named Honey, and a 3500 SF house. Available with or without tummy tuck and face lift. Workaholic Ken sold only in conjunction with "augmented" version.

Harwinton Barbie - This modern-day homemaker Barbie is available with Ford Windstar minivan and matching gym outfit. She gets lost easily and has no full time occupation or secondary education. Traffic-jamming cell phone included, headset sold separately.

Bridgeport Barbie - This recently paroled former "Porn Actress" Barbie comes with a Chevy with dark tinted windows, and a meth-lab kit. This model is only available after dark and can only be paid for in cash. Preferably small, untraceable bills. Unless you are a cop, then we don't know what you are talking about.

West Hartford Barbie - This yuppie Barbie comes with your choice of BMW convertible or Hummer H2. Included are her own Starbucks cup, credit card, and country club membership. Also available for this set are Shallow Ken and Private School Skipper. You won't be able to afford any of them.

Bristol Barbie - This pale model comes dressed in her own Wrangler jeans two sizes too small, a NASCAR shirt, and Tweety Bird tattoo on her shoulder. She has a six-pack of Coors Light and a Hank Williams, Jr. CD set. She can spit over 5 feet and kick mullet-haired Ken's ass when she is drunk. Purchase her pickup truck separately and get a confederate flag bumper sticker absolutely free.

Glastonbury Barbie - This collagen injected, rhinoplastic Barbie wears a leopard print bikini outfit and drinks cosmopolitans while entertaining friends at the McMansion. Percocet prescription available.

Shelton Barbie - This tobacco chewing, brassy-haired Barbie has a pair of her own high-heeled sandals with one broken heel from the time she chased Beer-Gut Ken out of Bristol Barbie's house. Her ensemble includes low-rise acid-washed jeans, fake fingernails, and a see-through halter top. Also available with a mobile home.

Woodbury Barbie - This doll is made of actual tofu. She has long straight brown hair, archless feet, hairy armpits, no makeup, and Birkenstocks with white socks. She prefers that you call her "Willow." She does not want or need a Ken doll, but if you purchase two Woodbury Barbies and the optional Subaru wagon, you get a rainbow flag sticker for free.

New Haven Barbie - This Spanish-speaking-only Barbie comes with a 1984 Toyota with expired temporary plates and four baby Barbies in the backseat (no car seats). The optional Ken doll comes with a paint-bucket lunch pail and is missing three fingers on his left hand. Green cards are not available for New Haven Barbie or Ken.

Waterbury Barbie - This Italian Princess Barbie comes with teased black hair, 12 gold chains, 7 gold bracelets, 8 rings and 1 ankle bracelet. Included are a permanently attached cell phone and a black Monte Carlo with ILUVTONY license plates. The accompanying Ken doll has been replaced with a black haired Tony doll with hairy chest and gel/hairdryer kit. A camera/cellphone with the Mayor's office on speed-dial is sold seperately.

Time to make nice .....

Britney ordered me to strip then used me for sex!..well not me but this guy , lucky bastard.

here are a couple hot Britney photos that are safe for work ....HERE and HERE

Kurt Cobain was killed. An investigative site that promises on April 3rd, 2004, a groundbreaking story.

When ants attack!

This guy writes : "In 1998, I briefly worked as a process server in the County of Sacramento while attending college. I wrote this story for the Sacramento City Express while attending classes."

A Romanian DJ has seized a radio station and threatened to jump from a balcony if his employer cut the broadcast and told listeners he wanted his overdue salary

Here are All your favorite browsers from long ago.

What a douche ...A woman imprisoned for faking her daughter's leukemia to gain thousands of dollars in donations has told how she first concocted the scheme to keep her husband from leaving.

My son Peter has always loved to play hide and seek. In fact, he loves it so much that he will wake me up in the middle of the night to play. The only problem is that Peter has been dead for eight years

An artist who used dust collected from the streets of New York after the September 11 terror attacks has won a major new art prize.

The Stanford Prison Experiment: A Simulation Study of the Psychology of Imprisonment

A Man lived with 70 goats in house , betcha he never had a lonely night in that house ?

Ok , see ya tommorow and if your around Jonathan Law high tommorow i'll be umpiring the girls softball game ...stop by and say hello .

Monday morning musings

Attention commuters: The northbound lanes of I-95 have opened in Bridgeport. The scheduled reopening of the more heavily damaged southbound lanes, meanwhile, was pushed up to Thursday.

NASA has made aeronautics history by launching an experimental jet that reached a record velocity of just over seven times the speed of sound.

At least 82 women were secretly videotaped naked or partly undressed while applying for jobs at a Los Angeles-area Hooters restaurant.

Dennis Hope sells undeveloped land for the bargain price of $19.99 an acre. Not a bad price. One problem though. They're on the Moon.

A Florida middle school student has been suspended because she is wearing a small diamond stud in her nose, which the principal says is distracting.

Okay guys, you are all about to feel very small. Check out this whale's penis.

Bored? Here's an illustrated history of the folding chair.

When police noticed Dina Dagy's family was spending $250 to $300 a month on electricity, they suspected a marijuana farm was flourishing under high-intensity lights inside their suburban home. Oops. Their mistake.

I think I posted this a long time ago, but it's still very cool. Play 20 questions against the computer.

The Georgia House of Representatives voted to ban genital piercings for women last week. Violations would be punishable by two to 20 years in prison. Hmm. This should be interesting to watch unfold.

This is amazing: Check out the skill with which this guy flies an RC helicopter. (I want one of these so badly.)

Picking your nose and eating it is one of the best ways to stay healthy, according to a top Austrian doctor. Um. Yeah, right.

Wouldn't this be a great option in cars? (Click the 4 photos to view the short videos.)

Rich's Monday Super Column

I hope everyone had a great weekend ,and I hope everybody also enjoyed the sports edition of the DC I posted on friday , it was alot of fun to do .

Ok , let's get dirty .....

A streaker bypassed security at the world championships, skated onto the ice and put on a tutu

Here is Rudy Huxtable all grown up

A Psychic tip prompts bomb search on plane...huh ?

Match the logo game is back, this time it's for websites...no DC yet

A revolutionary jet engine has flown faster than seven times the speed of sound in a high altitude test over the Pacific, marking what NASA scientists hailed as a milestone in developing the "Holy Grail" of space travel

Did I miss something?

The Miami Police have been Accused of Profiling Rap Artists

Michael White dancing to Michael Jackson's music

France tells its schools to screen Schindlers List and The Piano to combat a rising tide of anti-Semitism

Lots of beautiful women wearing very little.

Put 30 drug testing workers in a room together for a few hours and it isn't long before they start trading strange - and somewhat indelicate - tales of urine collection

New "I did it for science" article. Experiment: To literally have sex with myself

More than two decades have passed since a serial killer terrorized Wichita, strangling or stabbing seven victims and bragging about it to the media. Police hadn't heard a peep from the killer in 25 years -- until now.

In other news ....the Japenese celebrate their annual festival of the penis

Rich's All - Sports Edition

Het Sports fans , this is a little change from the norm because this column is going to be all about sports in one way or another so sit back , grab yourself a beer and the remote and have fun surfing your way to Sports Bliss.

We will break it down by sports so you girls can keep up too ...

BASEBALL :

For all you Red Sox fans who have suffered through all the heartache with this team , suffer on ....

For all the Softball players like myself who want to keep up with current happenings in CT , there's CT SOFTBALL

Everyone looking for cheap or blemished gloves, bats and accsesories for baseball of softball check out this site.

And to throw the Sox fans a bone , order one of these today and get your asses kicked at the stadium.

The Official Baseball Almanac site , everything you wanted to know and Baseball.

FOOTBALL :

The best Fantasy Football league on the planet , of course it's mine .

A guy from my league has way too much time on his hands ...no really .

A little NFL Trivia , how did you do ?

My team is the Dallas Cowboys and this is the best fan site around hands down.

Do you hate kickers , cause I hate kickers and so does this guy .

For all you women ...NFL for her .

Here is the history of Superbowl commercials .

HOCKEY :

For all you weekend warriors like myself , here is where I play in my free time (my team is in DEK E-3 division - The Pack ...check us out .)

For all you who dont want to drive to Waterbury, This is where I ref ..it's in Milford and the season is strating soon ..check us out .

Remember the New Haven Nighthawks , damn I miss them .

Ahh Hockey Goons , you gotta love em ...and here are the Top Ten .

A Hockey Puck puzzle that will keep you busy for hours .

BASKETBALL

The NBA , you cant stop watching it .

Cool site from the greatest ever .

Magic vs Bird , the best rivarly ever .

Wanna talk about playing hard , these guys take it to the hole ...literally !

For all you fair weather UConn fans , this is for you .

I cant believe they have this either until I found it but obviously there is a woman's Basketball museum somewhere .

POT POURRI

For your morning sports reading , here is every sports page nationwide

Can you tell the extreme sports from the wierd extreme sports ?

Enter the biggest penis contest

Have you ever watched Backyard Wrestling ? ...these fucking guys are out of thier minds .

Ever want to learn how to master Curling , well this is your lucky day .

The Red Bull Flutag contest is rolling around , check it out .

Ok , maybe Ill do another one of these real soon , but enjoy this one sports fans .

Wednesday words

Hi. Remember me? Been a while since I've shown my face around here. Let's start with something controversial.

Today, the U.S. Supreme Court will hear arguments in a case that could remove the words "under God" from the Pledge of Allegiance. Personally, I believe the existence of the words "under God" in the Pledge are essentially harmless, but, I don't think they belong in the Pledge. After all, they were not always there. They were specifically added in in 1954 at the behest of religious leaders in order "to recognize a Supreme Being" and to advance religion at a time "when the government was publicly fighting against atheistic communism." (Man, am I gonna catch shit for this.) What do you think?

Pretty cool: NASA, Mars had a shallow pool of briny water on its surface long ago -- the strongest evidence yet that the Red Planet was once able to sustain life.

Naked karaoke is back on track at a New Britain, CT bar, following a court ruling Monday.

A movie to die for: A 43-year-old Brazilian pastor died of an apparent heart attack while watching the film "The Passion of the Christ." He's the second person to die while watching.

A 5-year-old boy took a bag of marijuana to school and was sprinkling it over a friend's lasagna like oregano when a monitor intervened.

Think that's bad? Well, a 4-year-old boy brought crack cocaine worth up to $10,000 to his preschool class Monday.

Nice cleavage, Rachel.

In idiot news: In Australia, a 23-year-old woman called the police to report that her marijuana plants had been stolen.

Watch out iTunes: On Tuesday, Walmart formally opened its online music store, from which customers can download music at 88 cents per song. That's 11 cents less than Apple Computer charges at its iTunes music store.

Hey, what's your porn name?

Web surfers may be able to talk to their computers one day using a browser announced Tuesday by Opera Software.

Don't click this.

This is cool: It's a time lapse movie of a climbing plant.

You've heard of grabbing the bull by the balls. Here's the opposite.

In feel good news: Here's a guy who's going to Heaven. And so is this guy.

Rich's Worst Contest Winners day

Today is the day we really let all the shitty music loose on the TDC and some of you had alot to do with it . I am going to post every entry I got for this contest because every one is so good and bad in there own way , so with that said get your barf bags out in case you start felling queezy from this shitfest ...

Our contest winners column is right after this one so please check it out .

First entry is from our winner this week, ERIC BURNS :

Here is my top 10 Worst Songs Ever for a CD....

10: Achy Breaky Heart, Billy Ray Cyrus (I would dance naked in
front of the pope than dance to this song. But, Billy made the mullet
fashionable again for 20 minutes, so got to give props to him)
9: Ebony and Ivory, Stevie Wonder and Paul McCartney (Guaranteed
to stay in your head for 2 days straight!)
8: Ice, Ice Baby- Vanilla Ice (Slaughtered the "Under Pressure"
song from Queen)
7: Every Rose Has Its Thorn- Poison (and every night has its
dawn. Bret Michaels is such a poetic genius with his lyrics)
6: mmm BOP- Hansen (mmm bop, mmm bop, BOP, good bye HANSEN!!!!,
the most annoying song from the 90's)
5: Girl You Know It's True- Milli Vanilli (the worst group of
all time, I might add...well, not even a group though, a farce)
4: Winds of Change- Scorpions (This song makes me drop to my
knees and want to blow my head up)
3: Babe- Styx (It's a shame. Tommy Shaw is a talented guitar
player but he stooped to an all time low with this. Makes Mr. Roboto
sound like a good song)
2: Candle In The Wind- Elton John (Elton, why....just why.....)
1: Higher- Creed (Scott Stapp truly thinks he has been
reincarnated into Jesus Christ since he wrote this pathetic song.)

One from forum member IRISMAY :

Danke Schoen - Wayne Newton
Conga - Miami Sound Machine
How am I supposed to live with you? - Michael Bolton
Horse with no Name - America
Sharing the night together - Dr. Hook
Feelings - Maurice Albert
All I wanna do - Sheryl Crow
Do you think I'm sexy? - Rod Stewart
My Ding a Ling - Chuck Berry
Any Man of Mine - Shania Twain

One from ANNIE B:

Winchester Cathedral
Alone again, Naturally
Feelings
Muskrat Love
She Bangs
Inagodadavida (not sure if this is how its spelled)
Dominica
Honey

One from VICKY SHULTZ :

Patrick Swayze – She’s like the wind

Extreme – More than words

Carpenters – Close to You

David Hasselhoff – Flying on the wings of tenderness

Barry Manilow – Looks like we made it

Kathie Lee Gifford – Somewhere over the rainbow

Bette Midler – Wind beneath my wings

John Tesh – Take a look at me now (sax rendition)

Celine Dion – My heart will go on (yes, the one from Titanic)

Whitney Houston – I will always love you

One from MITCH in L.I :

These are in no particular order, but I had a hard time staying conscious after #7.

1. "Seasons In The Sun" Terry Jacks

2. "Kung Fu Fighting" Carl Douglas?

3. "You & Me Against The World" Helen Reddy

4. "You're Having My Baby" Paul Anka & Odia Cotes (sp?)

5. "Musicbox Dancer" (the artist's name escapes me)

6. "Afternoon Delight" The Starland Vocal Band

7. "Sugar, Sugar" The Archies

8. "Half-Breed" Cher

9. "Ben" Michael Jackson. (any song about a rat deserves to be on anybody's "worst list")

10. "I've Got A Brand New Pair Of Roller Skates" Melanie

I hope you find these as bad as I do. Enjoy the DC, keep up the good work!

One from JOE CIP :

Music to Vomit by...

1) Mickey by Toni Basil

2) Anything by Michael Bolton

3) Just Don't Know What to Do With Myself by White Stripes (listen and see
what I mean)

4) I am Woman by Helen Reddy

5) I Gotta Be Me or The Candy Man by Sammy Davis Jr.

6) Anything by Air Supply

7) Feelings by Offspring

8) Tiptoe Through the Tulips by Tiny Tim

9) Anything by REO Speedwagon, Styx, or the Human League

10) Mickey, the Spanish Version, by Toni Basil

The thing that made me totally despise Mickey by Toni Basil was the fact
that while waiting for my wife and daughter at a predetermined site in
Disney World I had to wait withing earshot of a ride that kept playing
Mickey over and over and over and over again....first in English....then in
Spanish. The fact that they were a half hour late has made that song my
least favorite of all time.

One from JEFF K :

10- Afternoon Delight
9- You light up my life
8- Somewhere over the Rainbow
7- Feelings
6- McArthur Park
5- Muskrat Love
4- Tubthumping
3- Achy Breaky Heart
2- Electric Slide
1- Anything by Celine Deion

One from DEATHSTICK :

Anything by The Shaggs (theyre awesome, but really bad...they were a fave of Zappa's), or Grandma Got Run Over by a Reindeer.

One from IABASIS :

10. “Fish Heads.” I dunno who wrote, or sung this piece of shit, but thanx to Dr. Demento, in the 80’s, I still find myself singing this awful tripe, usually when I’m hoping no one will try to open the stall in which I am currently yacking. BTW, joke: How do you help out a Mic (Of which I am one, so no hate letters)? Punchline: smack ‘im on the back of the head with the toilet seat, so he can get some rest...

9. “ Killing Me Softly.” O.K., sure, Karen Carpenter was, like, honey on the tongue, I mean (pulls out blow-up-hand-doll here) that chick could moan, but WTF: Kill Me Loudly, Pleeeeze, make me fucking scream!!

8. You’se Spin Me Right ‘Round, Baby Right ‘Round. Uhh, No Fucking way. C’mon, dude, pick an orifice already! Then call my ugly cousin Lolito (sex undetermined as of yet) and let’s hope for answers we can all relate to.

7. Anything by the Pet Shop Boys, Frankie Goes To Hollywood, or Echo and the Bunnymen. (But don’t include Split Enz here, even tho’ they can also be equally “faggy,” but for that one song, “I Hope I Never...” ---which pretty fucking good for a breakup song, even if it is still pretty “faggy.”

(All together now) ...“Not that there’s anything wrong with that...”

6. “Let’s Get Physical.” Olivia, honey, baby. I creamed when that video came out in the, what was it, ‘30’s? Damn, if I had that liver now that I had then.... But Olivia, how come you never did the Paris Hilton thingy? For not showing us more, you tease, let me never hear another word of this “almost but not quite” innuendo, like hearing folks in the apartment next door going at it, putting the drinking glass up to the wall, affixing ear, and then hearing some dude going solo at it, (even if he could do both parts equally well, in A minor and G, with a suspended third chord...)

5. “Catwalk,” Right Said Fred. ‘Nuff said.

4. “Cat People,” David Bowie. All right, All right, I actually like this. Sue me. “See these eyes so red...”

3. “Too Cool, Shy to Shy,” Kajagoogoo. Umm, I’m seriously not against homosexuality. I think that if you are lucky enough to find someone on this god-forsaken-planet who will put up you and all your irritating habits, then you deserve the same rights as anyone else, marriage included. That being said, this here song shows that there is a time for being flamboyant, and there is NOT a time for being FlameBoyant!

2. “I Wear My Sunglasses At Night.” Corey, what, Haims? Feldman? This is the ultimate tribute to the plasticene Scene of the eigthies, along with the song “Nobody Walks In L.A.,” or, anything done by the Human League , Flock of Seagulls (exept for “Wishing I Had A Photograph of“...Nawww...Fuck it..., and the entire catalogue of “Night Ranger...”

1. Which brings me to this one song that just fucking makes me curl up into a ball, fist tightly stuffed into mouth---”Raspberry Beret.” THIS? From the guy who wrote , “Little Red Corvette?” “Nikki?”

The fucking rock gospel opera , “Purple Rain?”

Ok, so I heard he ripped it from a niece’s diary. Wait. That makes it worse.

One from MEANCARLENE :

1. my heart will go on - celine dion
2. da-doo-run-run - shaun cassidy
3. wildfire - michael martin murphy
4. the ballad of the green berets - staff sgt. barry sadler
5. heartbeat - don johnson
6. believe - cher
7. lost in love - air supply
8. all i need - jack wagner aka frisco
9. never gonna give you up - rick astley
10. puttin' on the ritz - taco

hidden track - she's like the wind - patrick swayze

One from forum member LEANDROC :

No particular order, I hate these songs equally!

1. Phil Collins - Sussudio -(The worst song Phil ever did, why did this stupid ass song get so much air time? This song su su ssucked!!!)

2. Aqua - Barbie Girl (WTF?!!!!, not only that, I get the fricking tune in my head for 3 hours straight!)

3. Walk Like an Egyptian- Bangles ( my sisters, now in thier late 30's loved this damn song, and Yes I myself used to walk like an egyptian, only since then have i felt the shame of ever doing so.)

4. Back to Phil with Genesis and I Can't Dance ( No shit? you're white and have no business ever being in a music video trying to)

5. Whitney Houstin, Just about every song she sang, especially I wanna Dance. I wanna dance too, but how the HELL does a Black woman sing the WHITEST tune ever, I mean this song offers no beat, no soul, no rythm to dance to at all!!!

6. MC Hammer - Pray - FOR WHAT you ask?, money, cause he went broke after his career hit rock bottom.( and probably cause of this stupid ass song.) I have nothing against prayer, but MC HAMMER WAS RAPPING...and... you know!!!!

7. Short dick man- can't remember who sang it- But it hit too close to home if you know what i mean!!! (I'm asian, it's no secret)

8. I'd do anything for love - Meatloaf- No kidding, you ugly bastard, Stupid ass bridge, i mean it's gotta be THEEE WORST bridge as it completely destroys the rythm of the song. Other than that, I used to like the song.

9. Creed - What's this life for ( Come on now Scott, was it completely necessary to use blasphemey in what could have been a nice tune, that and what the hell are talking about in the first place? ) If it wasn't for the fact my voice can carry most Creed songs in Karaoke, I'd never listen to them at all.

10. Kung Fu Fighting - Wang Chung( Don't..just... I can't... Fuck it, YOU GOTTA BE KIDDING ME AMERICA!!!! These assholes made millions with songs like these. If i hear these songs at a wedding one more time, I'm leaving. The lyrics alone should make you want to gouge your own eye out with a rusty nail. Nobody in the world should be rewarded for such disgraceful waste of air waves!!!)

Eric's Winning Column

First off, I would like to thank Richie and everyone else at TDC for allowing me to start off each morning with a laugh. I forgot how I found TDC, but I think I have been reading it for the last year or so.

Well, here is my list- and in no particular order:

I'm a big fan of mullets. Last summer, I hunted down a mullet in New Hampshire and donated the picture to the site. (Click on page 10 of "Top Mullet Pic, scroll down to "sloppy mullet", and that's mine.)

Every Monday, I check out this site for my fix on Camel Toes. Everyone should do the same.

Every March, you can always count on someone to create a spreadsheet for
the "BABES" tournament- well, download one here:

Speaking of babes- let's do a quick rundown;

She can spank me anytime.......

I'll let these chicks "servix" my drinks any day

A great guide to porn

Since the contest was about bad music, let's check out some bad music
sites:

I HATE CREED! Scott Stapp is such a poser to Eddie Vedder it is not even
funny. The fact that Creed sold 20 someone million albums so far is such
a farce. I want to meet the riff-raff who bought the albums and just ask
them WHY??? Anyway, here is site that supports my love of the band

It's so classic that Beavis and Butthead were able to ruin this man's
dream of being a legitimate rock star- please meet Kip Winger:

Every Rose Has Its Thorn. Every Night Has Its Dawn. Every Cowboy Sings A
Sad Sad Song. Bret Michaels is such a genius with his lyrics. I can see why people confuse him with someone like Robert Plant..........

Let's visit some sites about things I enjoy:

My ability to do this is what made my wife fall in love with me.

A day is never complete without doing this .

Let's cut to the chase- here are your 2004 World Series Champs

The greatest band of all time

The greatest website to hear the greatest band of all time at work

Finally, some really silly sites:

What's your name....Fletch F. Fletch....What do you do for a living? I'm
a Shepard....this and plenty more at the largest site devoted to all things Fletch.

It's a lot like sex. A Painstaking Arduous task that seems to go on and
on. Just when you think things are going your way, nothing happens. If
you are a fan of The Naked Gun movie series- this is all about you!

According to this site Knight Rider will be back on the air (reruns) starting on March 29th on Sci-Fi channel. Can someone explain to me why and how is Knight Rider a sci-fi show?!! Regardless, the site is funny. (but the webmaster needs to get a life.....)

Ponch and Jon....Sgt Joe Getraer, Grossie, and Barry Barixa....if you know these cats, well then, visit the all things CHiPS website

Well, it has been a pleasure doing this and hope everyone enjoyed it!!

Cheers-
Eric

Hoot's Springtime Salute

This was Hoot's Sunday column. I wasn't around to post it, so here it is today instead.

Hello everyone! Yes I am still kicking. Been busy lately and haven't had time to write. Well I know Richie, myself and lots of other people are happy that yesterday was the first day of spring.
I myself don't mind winter but I am ready for the warmer weather and less clothes on women!

Shall we begin....

Careful if you holiday(as the Brits would say) in Thailand. It just may kill you.

Want your voice heard in Washington, D.C.? Try this out.

This is interesting. Premature twins that have separate birthdays.

With all the idiots on the roads these days I need one of these!

Ouch!

Bring out the Picasso in you.

This is funny. Click here and read the story headline!

Mo Kin, a three-year-old North Korean girl, master genius of the xylophone.

A gorilla in a Dallas, Texas zoo escapes, goes on a rampage and has to be shot.

This is a simple but kind of addicting helicopter game. How far can you get? I went 1,064.

Mouth shaped urinals complete with lipstick!!!

A little rusty with your disco moves out on the dance floor. Well let the discofinska show you the groovy way! This is pretty funny, watch the whole thing.

I linked to a clean version of this game before. Here is the graphic hit the penguin game.

This IBC Root Beer commercial explains why you should drink root beer and not beer. Hilarious!!! Here is another one!

This is a way fucking cool animation! You have to click the box a couple times to continue.

Play Nut-Nut.

Here it is, the new CBS logo!

American celebrities in Japanese commercials.

OK thats all for today. Peace! Hoot23

Rich's Monday Super column

For all you College basketball fans like myself , this year's tourney is unreal ...practically every game is coming down to the last minute and last shot of the game , And I am loving every single second of it .

Be on the lookout for the Contest Winner tommorow along with every entry I got in the 10 worst songs contest, It should be pretty funny .

Ok , no more talk ....

Howard Stern accused Oprah Winfrey of being a fellow potty-mouth yesterday, saying the afternoon TV queen has aired the same kind of kinky sexual material for which he was being pilloried.

Rows and rows of hos and hos. I couldn't find any NSFW, but keep your eyes out.

YASSER Arafat has watched Mel Gibson's film The Passion of the Christ with a top aide, who compared Jesus' pain during crucifixion to Palestinians' suffering in the conflict with Israel.

Speaking of the movie , here's The Passion of the Christ - The Flash Movie!

The PowerBar Founder Dies of Heart Attack at age 51

Ever wonder what airport security does with your dangerous items? I bet all the cool stuff gets taken home.

Airport security agents at Boston's Logan International Airport stopped a biologist after discovering the severed head of a harbor seal in his luggage.

Achieving stability is much more complex than on any other platform, which is why no one has succeeded at creating an autonomous motorcycle

A few years ago Matt & Trey were asked by Shockwave to do a few flash cartoon for them. Matt & Trey agreed if only they were not given any restrictions. Shockwave said go ahead and then the series 'Princess' was born. Shockwave found it too offensive and never released it on the shockwave.com..
Here is Episode 1 and Episode 2

Police in Miami arrest eleven men who allegedly used a Web site to choose a public place to meet and masturbate...funny that Jambo hasnt been around all last week, huh ?

A completely screwed up demented game...trust me .

I always wondered if this happened.

Meet the robo-nurse....She can remind you to eat breakfast, guide you to the bathroom and even bat her eyes approvingly while you swallow your medicine

Great Paparazzi pics of Jordan topless

The FCC strikes again ...Ga. Radio Morning Show Hosts Suspended

Here's some Grootlicht Interactive Design

Ok , Tommorow should be a fun day in here !

Rich's Friday Stuff

READ THIS ...Un-fucking real ?!@#!#$%?

Ill wait to hear your views on it before I comment because I have lots to say about it .

It's Funtime ....

Nineteen-year-old Canadian dancer Lucie Marshal has been fired for appearing in website photos deemed inappropriate by her employer, NBA basketball team the Toronto Raptors ...here are some of the pics Here and Hereconstruction of a lady..try it .

Being gay could be a crime in Tenn. county

Apparently Google is experimenting with a new look. Follow the links for screenshots and other information

I know what girls want...I do.

A Seminole County teacher was removed from her duties in the classroom, after showing too much skin at a Super Bowl party.

Best Buy and the Ass.

Actress-turned-novelist Pamela Anderson has taken into service a ghostwriter to help her with her first two novels

Horseracing fun, got old fast for me but maybe some of you will enjoy it

A professor who claimed she was targeted in a hate crime that stirred student protests at the Claremont colleges is suspected of staging the vandalism herself

Old, but good, it's Coolio's Babes

Twins have 80k dollars worth of plastic surgery to look like Brad Pitt (photos included)

Here's some Accidental video game porn

If you're seeing a lot of out-of-shape, unkempt people on the street lately, here's why: Grooming, exercise and makeup are falling by the wayside for many Americans.

For all you Jennifer Garner fans, she single again and her nipple is out too HERE.

Dawn of the Dead game, simple yet nicely done. Gets pretty hard.

The Exorcist in 30 seconds (and re-enacted by bunnies).

Anti-terror police in Germany swooped when they got a call from a distressed woman crying: "Bin Laden, Bin Laden" in a supermarket.

This is pretty cool , Create your own Southpark character.

Rich's Humpday Happenings

Well so far we have exactly 1 entry in this week's contest , COME ON PEOPLE get those entries in because this could be alot of fun come next monday when all the entries are posted ...If you dont know what it's about this week, we are trying to come up with the Worst Mix Cd ever . The worst 10 songs on one cd of all time , think of them write them in an email and send them to me at richie@thedailycolumn.com

This weather is making my S.A.D act up again and im in a permanant bad mood all day today .

Ok , a shortie today .....

A typo on a flyer for Busch Gardens led surprised callers to a recorded sex line

Now you too can be cool, without actually, you know, being cool

From the "No Shit Sherlok " file ...Whitney Houston has entered a drug rehabilitation facility

Muslim celebrations on Ashoura Day (some images are graphic/bloody)

A CHINESE couple raised their only child for 13 years in the belief it was a girl, until a visit to the local hospital alerted them to the fact that he was really a boy

Gumblondes -- "Each Gum Blonde is 100% chewed bubblegum on a plywood backing. No paint or Dye is used."

"Passion of the Christ " star told J-Lo to put her clothes back on

Here in Kansas, we like to rice our lighters.

American Panda Gets Sent to China to Watch Panda Porn....why wasnt I invited ?

Too much time on hands = "A Practical Examination of Maria Menounos' Breasts"

AN Afghan soldier was detained by police after being caught having sex with a donkey in southeastern Afghanistan

Hmm, a pet skeleton sounds kinda cool.

Ok , im going out to shovel ...AGAIN !

Tuesday tidbits

Convicted felon Martha Stewart stepped down from her board seat and gave up her chief creative officer title, but will still retain a creative role at Martha Stewart Living Omnimedia Inc.

Here's a great little appliance to have.

A man who was laid off last week from his job at a tractor factory claimed the $89 million Powerball prize Monday with the sole winning ticket.

Check out these three guys trying to become the first to finish the J.R. Hohlier’s Sports Pub’s Five Pound Hamburger Challenge.

50 things guys wish girls knew.

Apple Computer Inc. said on Monday it has sold 50 million songs over the Internet in the 11 months since it launched its iTunes Music Store.

Most people don't know it, but the blow job was invented in 1972.

Toyota unveiled a trumpet-playing robot -- its first humanoid machine -- in a bid to catch up with robot technology frontrunners such as Honda and Sony. (They are apparently also working on another model that plays the skin flute.)

An interesting take on baby photos.

A 13-year-old Hong Kong boy flew into a rage and threatened his parents with a kitchen knife after his father pulled the plug on his computer game.

Since it's Spring Break time, here are some photos to get you in the mood.

I'll bet this hurt.

Scientists on Monday announced the discovery of a frozen, shiny red world some 8 billion miles from Earth that is the most distant known object in the solar system. They're calling it Sedna.

This is a fun game: It's like the old Concentration game with female bodies.

Here's a useful tool: The Spam Locater assists you in locating the geographical location that an email originated from.

Rich's Tuesday Tidbits

Dont put those shovels away yet , the snow starts at noon ...AGAIN !

Get those entries in for this week's contest , If you dont know about it read Monday's column .

Ok , Let's do this ......

THE internet and mobile phones have sparked a massive rise in extra-marital affairs

The classic 'Learning Channel' rejected commercials

For those of you who do not know her, Anna Ohura is a Japanese AV Idol, she makes adult movies and is famous for her beautiful face and of course, her impressive bust size. She may have the largest, natural breasts in Japan.

The South Pole station, with pictures

The Batmobile has been voted the ultimate big screen car, racing ahead of James Bond's Aston Martin in a poll of film fans.

New game from PopCap. It's Zuma, and it stars some sort of gem spitting frog

A German train passenger on his way to buy a car in the Netherlands, unwittingly dumped $13,530 down the train toilet..Umm what ?

Tons of links to various female model websites.

This is for SkittleBrau ..... Guinness bubbles really do sink. Scientists said on Monday they had finally proved that the dark stout's creamy bubbles defy expectations and flow down instead of upwards

Mad Etch-A-Sketch skills will get get you all the wimenz!

Osama bin Laden narrowly escaped capture by French troops working with American forces in Afghanistan, perhaps several times, the head of France's armed forces said Monday.

SAVE SAM AND MAX! (seriously, sign this petition!)

Rich's Monday Super Column

Hello everyone , I hope everyone got to go down to the St Paddy's Day Parade yesterday in New Haven because if you have never been to this thing, It is quite the drunken event ! It's probably the only day of the whole year where the police turn there bcak's on practicaly everything they see ...it's fantastic!

Ok well today is monday and that means contest time but this week Im going to do something a little different than the usual contest photo . This week im going ask you guys to come up with the WORST POSSIBLE MIX CD EVER !!!! I mean I want this to have the 10 worst songs of all time and they could be any style music you want , you can mix and match styles , spoken word , comedy pop , rock ....whatever and the winner will be judged at the end of this week . Please only limit yourself to 1 or 2 entries because I feel im going to get alot of responses for this contest and I dont want to get too swamped with emails . So get that terrible music out of the basement and look through all those K-TEL records to find the 10 worst songs on 1 cd of all time .

Send to richie@thedailycolumn.com

I am going to probably post everyone's emails on this one next Monday cause I think that wil be funny as hell

Ok , lets go ....

Bow Ouch Ouch , Snoop Dogg fainted at his son's birth

The rat hunter, complete with bloody pictures of all the rats he's killed.

For the past month, students in Lee County, Fla., have been thumbprinted every time they get on and off the school bus

It's not quite beastiality, but it's not quite right either.

BRITNEY Spears has done a U-turn on her new video after The Sun revealed it showed her killing herself in the bath

Is Japan is trying to whoop The Matrix with a new movie called Casshern?

Did you know that Keyboards, computer mice and telephone dials are more infested with microbes than toilet seats, according to a study.

Fake is the new real.

MICHAEL Jackson paraded naked in front of alleged abuse victim Gavin Arvizo and had explicit sex chats with the boy

B I N G O ..and bingo was his naaaaamo , kinda ?

EBAY halted an auction this week and suspended a Taiwanese user who allegedly tried to sell three Vietnamese girls on the internet site for a starting bid of $5400

All the unidentified dead people from around Las Vegas, some with (possibly graphic) pictures

The FCC's at it again ...Morning show host fined $247,500 for interview with Ron Jeremy

When somebody annoys you with a camera, don't just get angry, throw your dog!

Vintage Girlie Mags and No razors in sight.

Rich's Friday Stuff

Soooo sick yesterday, I went to bed a 8pm and didnt get up until 9am ...bad bad day .

A German scientist who created an exhibition of human corpses has been cleared of allegations that he illegally obtained some of the bodies.

The Jay-Z Construction Set is a toolkit with all of the necessary software and raw materials to create a new remix of Jay-Z's Black Album. Bring out your inner thug.

A Sydney bar owner has expelled a group of drinkers after accusing them of casting spells in his pub

Meet Asia's own The Singhson

A 12-year-old girl was beaten into a coma by a group of other girls and women after she kissed the boyfriend of another girl on a dare

For Sale, my severed ankle

Two Dutch political parties are calling for laws prohibiting sex with animals after a man suspected of having sex with a pony was set free.

Here's some Virtual knee surgery.

Love cheats or lazy employees looking for a "sound alibi" may have found a handy one, quite literally

Download Your Favorite Childhood TV Memory

Texas man did the drinking and decided to let his 11-year-old son, who was barely able to see over the steering wheel, do the driving

KY Jelly wrasslin! YES.

Janet and Justin dolls with malfunctioning wardrobe goes on sale on eBay

Biking through Chernobyl

I'm just a squirrel trying to get a nut

Seven cadavers donated to a US university's medical school were sold to the Army and blown up in land mine experiments

Create your own graffiti.

Thursday thoughts

Scientists have discovered a new way to defy menopause which could change women's lives. (And their mate's as well, I would imagine.)

This is cool. The Berkeley Lower Extremities Exoskeleton is a set of strap-on robotic legs designed to turn an ordinary human into a super strider.

George Michael said he was retiring from the music business and intended instead to put all his future songs on the Internet -- for free.

Diana Ross will have to return to Arizona to serve a two-day jail sentence for her drunk driving conviction.

Two employees of a Wendy's in North Carolina were photographed bathing in a dishwashing sink at the fast-food restaurant. The sink has cleaning jets and is normally used to wash pots, pans and other cookware.

Read this: The 100 most often mispronounced words and phrases in English.

The highest IQs, listed by country.

Idiot: A woman was caught trying to use a fake $1 million bill to buy $1,675 worth of merchandise at a Wal-Mart.

Israeli police who pulled over a Palestinian taxi in the West Bank watched in amazement as 27 children spilled out of the vehicle.

Seen this insurance company ad yet?

This is so funny: A bunch of soldiers getting stuck in quicksand. (No one gets hurt.)

Hmm, think this security guard got fired?

A Bangladeshi pilot needed first aid after a stowaway cat got into the cockpit of his aircraft and attacked him.

A Florida Judge decided that "a videotape of an underage girl exposing her breasts without physical contact is not child pornography." It stemmed from a criminal case against the producer of the "Girls Gone Wild" video series.

Ladies: The Boyfriend-Marker is your way to a stable relationship!!

Rich's Humpday Happenings

I seem to have alot of things to get off my chest lately and here is another.... I have Dish Network and I love it . I have had the dish for about 2 years and never had a problem with signal or reception . I have 180 regular channels plus 18 movie channels and couldnt be happier ....until yesterday . Yesterday Dish Network took away all of the Viacom channels because of a contract dispute. If you dont know what the Viacom channels are they are MTV, Comedy Central , VH1, Nickelodeon, Noggin, BET , MTV2 and VH1 classics . Now I watch these channels more than anything and my kids love the shows on Noggin and Nickelodeon and I am pissed about this whole situation. They say they are trying to save us money and Viacom is being unreasonable and when I call and threaten to quit my service their stand on it is pretty much if you want to quit , quit...What should I do ?...read up on this situation here .

Ok lets have some fun ....

Carmen Electra shows off the electrifying curves that won her a role in the Starsky & Hutch film but says she longs for SMALLER boobs

Apparently this is the main difference between Europe and the USA.

Police arrested a woman and her boyfriend on charges they used a bedsheet to tie up her 1-year-old daughter so they could go out dancing.

Some people never seem motivated to participate, but are just content to watch while others do the work. They are called 'Spec Taters'

Global hamburger giant McDonald's latest line in healthy looking salads may contain more fat than its hamburgers, according to the company's website.

Nick Lachey is a lucky man

This is wallpaper for all you hardcore rockers!

Mayor John Fagot has implemented a "ban" on shaving for every man in town older than 21. Those caught clean-shaven without a shaving permit could face being dunked in a horse tank or other benign punishment.

Her milkshake brings all the boys to the yard... Definately fap juice for those that are into.. umm.. bigger women. (Yes, I hate you too)

The farmer John Kasokong had allegedly not bathed for 10 years and his odor reportedly overpowered local people...so the locals washed him .

Couronne might actually be the most frustrating game ever made.

I love death ???

Mmmm.. Sidney Moon

And to finish , here's how to be a ninja .

Rich's Tuesday Winner's Column

The Results are in and we have a winner from last week's Contest Picture contest ....It's forum member Fast Cast !

first off , here is last weeks picture

Fast Cast's winning quote was : It was clear to the crowd that she was neither a Dallas Cowboy cheerleader, nor did she stay in a Holiday Inn Express last night

Second place went to Happy Mdeum with : Pussys OK, Dogs are Dead tired!

And a third place tie went to MeanCarlene with :Here we see Trixie, a rookie Dallas Cowboy cheerleader, relaxing after a hard day of fucking the team

And JBurr with : Like, is this what you make all the Cowboy's cheerleaders do for
initiation?

Thanks to all who put in entries and look for Fast Cast's Column right after mine today .

Now instead of doing a column today and ruining Fast Cast's day in the sun im just going to rant a little and let him take care of the links today ...

My first rant is to continue my tirade towards this whole West Haven High School matter , I have no idea why anyone hasnt taken this speaker to task for the things he said during his speech and the NAACP is just going after the principal for apologizing ?
I have gotten many emails about this but one person sent me 2 emails about this issue because thier kids go there and they wanted thier voice to be heard , now I promised not to publish this persons name or
email because they feel there might be reprisal towrds thier children but gave me the ok to publish the 2 emails this person sent me ....here is the first email in response to my previous rant :

" I agree with you.
And no one ever mentions the racial slurs that are thrown at my daughter and she can't say a thing because she will be crucified on the front page of the New Haven Register. But they can call her every name in their book and she has to keep quiet. This has gone on since 7th grade in Carrigan Middle School.

I'm sick of the double standards. "

And here is the second email as I was telling this person im sick of the NAACP's ways :

" I'm tired of it too. I would come out and say it but I have to watch out
for my kid and the retribution she would have to endure. Unfortunately,
this is the way it is.

You can put my email in your column but please not my name or email
address as I do have to think of my daughter. "

It's nice to see how the other side thinks once and a while , huh ?

Im going to save my next thing for tommorow in fear of being long winded ( like that has ever been a problem before )

Fast Cast's Winning Column

Fast Cast's Fish Fry(Beer Batter Optional)

This site is for the sharing of legal, live music from an approved band list. Mostly mp3's with some shn, artists include Dave Matthews, Grateful Dead, tons of Phish, and a few hundred more

Do you remember the frog in a blender? I stopped by recently and found a bunch of new animations

If you'd like to benefit from your tax dollars hard at work, check out your community's municipal recreation department

If it's the state in your pockets, and you like to take kids fishing, or would even consider getting certified as an instructor, check out C.A.R.E.

If you enjoy the outdoors, this might be the best $30. you spend on your family this year

You can hone up for your next scalping at the indians'
here and here

Shop 101: Is that a roller on your camshaft, or are you just glad to see me?

I love Charlize because of this and this . Here's a picture from when I finally got to meet her

Finally, something for Paula for always wearing her bull's-eye T-shirt and being a good sport about it

Monday, Monday

Thanks for your columns over the weekend Spunky. Good job. I liked your editorial on Saturday. The FCC "lynch mob" will soon be eliminating anything it sees as distasteful from the American airwaves. By the way, they are reversing their earlier ruling on Bono's use of the work "fucking" during the 2003 Golden Globes. So, here's a big, fat TDC Fuck You! to the FCC. (Since they can never control the Internet, I wouldn't be surprised to see Internet-based radio become popular in the future.)

Attorney General John Ashcroft is still in intensive care, with pancreatitis. (Here's what the pancreas does, if you're wondering.)

Astronomy buffs: Mercury, Venus, Mars, Saturn and Jupiter will all be visible at the same time later this month, and this wont happen again for another 32 years.

A 52-year-old Texas woman has given birth to her own grandchildren -- a pair of twin girls she bore as a surrogate mother for her daughter-in-law.

Useful gadget: The Sidewinder is a hand-powered cell phone charger. If your battery dies, just keep cranking and you can keep talking. I want one.

What the fuck is this?

Very cool slow motion video of a hand grenade exploding.

This woman rides her motorcycle around the Chernobyl "dead zone" and has put together some interesting pages on it. Remember, she's Russian so her English is a bit sketchy.

Another cool slow motion video: A water balloon bouncing.

Rich's Monday Super Column

What's Up Ya'll , I hope everyone got to get outside yesterday and enjoy that fantastic weather we had because this week is going to be messy

And believe it or not , there was a Peter sighting by me on saturday . I got to talk to him for about 10 mins and these days that is a rarity .

Ok , Im going to save the rants for tommorow .....

Remember John Henry Williams, the son of Ted Williams who tries to get his father frozen , Well he died of Luekemia yesterday.

Microsoft releases new version of 'Word'.

Oh happy day ! ...There is a new pill out that eliminates whiskey dick .

For all you clumsy bastards there is this hand-eye coordination test.

Find out what was In and Out at your prom ..oh man Im getting old .( I forgot who sent this to me , sorry)

Haunted by "strigoi" - the undead - villagers on the slopes of the Carpathian mountains exhume a corpse from the graveyard and drive a stake through its heart to banish the evil spirit.

Here's SNL's Jimmy Fallon as William Hung.

Desert Planet: Coin-operated disco beats and retro game pop

There is a woman in a man's body using the ladies' bathroom at the Madison Metro bus company and the women in women's bodies are not too happy about it.

A go-kart powered by a hydrogen peroxide gas turbine putting out 150 HP at 85,000 RPM, with video.

A life-long Spam eater, manager Abadilla says he came up with the idea of a Spam restaurant on his own and it's doing great ?

My gift to all the DCers with smart ass comments and believe me we got plenty of these

And to finish off , here is Michelle Lombardo from Galstonbury who made it into this years SI swimsuit edition ....GOD DAMN !!

Sunday Means Sopranos for Spunky!

I'm back, they haven't fired me yet! Sorry about yesterday's typing,I am horrible when I haven't had enough sleep.

I am very excited today The Soprano's are back!

After almost 2 years the new season begins tonight. It rumors to be an exciting season.

So you're a big fan of Big Pussy and know all sorts of Sopranos trivia, or do you. HBO has a couple games you can play to test your knowledge and gambling skills.

Everything you wanted to know about the mafia.

Tha Cam Mafia

Buscemi????

The movies that started it all

and now for something different.......

Here's a game for the those who support the war

Strip that girl

Poker??

Pool

Another Bin Ladden game

I love this game

From here on there will be alot of material

If you are under 18 please Click Here!

An American Girl

Basketball Anyone?

Twice as Nice

So Hot!

Why can't my couch look this good??

Laundry done right

Nice Hiney

I wanna go swimming now

The Reef remodeled

I think she said her name was Sandy

Backstage at a Poison concert

Ladies Don't ask me what it's about but it's The Velvet Mafia

That's All Folks! Once again I thank Peter and Richie for letting me do this. Have fun and don't forget to vote Richie best bartender.

Spunky's Saturday Spectacular

It's me again!!!! How you all been? Good I hope. It's supposed to be 60 today Ok , it's supposed to rain too, but it beats freezing my ass off. Today's column is probably going to be a hodgepodge of miscellaneous stuff so try to hang with me.

Are you ready?

I hope you are because we're about to begin.....

Note: Opinions in this broadcast are solely that of the broadcaster and do not reflect the views of The Daily Column, it's management, or affiliates. The Daily column claims no responsibility for it's content , or lack thereof......

I know it's hard for all of you to think this morning, but I wanted to share a few things I found out about the FCC and how it affects what you are listening to.(Stern fans should appreciate this)

This is old news ,but it ties in to what's been happening lately. I love the First Amendment and everything it represents that is why I really feel there needs to be seperation of church and state. This group was behind the fines recieved by Clear Channel . What really gets my ass is when the same governement agency pulls this shit.. The American Family Association is trying to have this ruling overturned.

In a related article the PRSA is challenging the recent actions of the FCC and has petitioned them to provide clearer guidliness. Read this! And this is a template of thier letter to congress.

Howard Stern is shitting bricks He's not going down without a fight though, here's some stories regarding his actions.

The Howard Stern Support Messageboard

I'm going to end this portion now, but I just want to add my two cents on the whole issue. I believe in Freedom of Speech. Take the time to check your congressmen and women and find out who's pockets they are in. I do believe there needs to be guidelines , but I also feel that religion needs to stay out of politics period! How does this relate to the topic? The FCC is run by the government, which is run by politicians ,however, these politicians are backed by some really radical religious groups.{Senator Sam Brownback lives in a house owned by a relegious organization along with 5 other representatives and sanators for a discounted rent} We, as Americans have a duty this November, to make sure we clean these people out of office. Get your asses out and vote! Take the time to research the candidates. And finally,don't vote for someone just because they have been there for years. ( Chris Dodd is a fine example) It's your country, make your voice heard.

Who wants some good stuff???

No I don't have any weed and I don't know where we can get some so can we go now?

Hey Drive -Thru girl you want to see my nuggets?

This story demonstrates just how paranoid terrorism has made the word

I saw Hoot with her at the reef right about closing time once

Ooops!

So you want to be on SWAT?

Undercover my ass

The Elle pic, just for you McNasty (or so they say)

If they allowed this to happen, I know alot of men that would quit thier jobs in a heartbeat

I guess she really liked to read cookbooks

Here's one for you snowboarders

I'm done for today. I hope you all enjoyed todays column, I'm not sure how long I can stay on with the FCC crackdown...... Fuck that! I'm coming back tommorow to poison you more. Remeber if you saw it here and disagree with my opinions or just want to say something, the forums are always here, join in!

Thank God it's Friday

Acupuncture on pain-relief points cuts blood flow to key areas of the brain within seconds, providing the clearest explanation to date for how the ancient technique might relieve pain and treat addictions.

This cat owner tracks whether or not the cats puke each day and whether a hairball was present or not.

An ad for supermodel Elle Macpherson's lingerie line has been banned after regulators received a complaint from the public that the model in the ad appeared to be masturbating.

Another one for Richie.

This looks fun: A Duct Tape Bikini contest.

WTF?

Crowds in Daytona Beach, Fla., enjoyed Bike Week's messiest event Wednesday as women wrestled each other in a giant pool of coleslaw.

Play a bunch of 1980s video games online.

According to this site, the new $20 bill explodes if you cook them in a microwave oven. Anyone want to try it to confirm it?

A dispute at the salad bar turned into a food fracas at an upscale retirement home, with a man taking a bite out of another's arm and other residents suffering minor injuries.

More real irony: It was a busy day for Melbourne firefighters. After responding to several emergency calls, they returned home to find their own station on fire.

Pretty cool: All of these portraits are made of chewed bubble gum on a wood background.

McDonald's has started phasing out its trademark Supersize fries and drinks in its U.S. restaurants as part of an effort to simplify its menu and give customers choices that support a balanced lifestyle.

Looking for a new background? Here are 1,000 of them.

Rich's Friday Rant time

Since Peter posted today again ..2 DAYS IN A ROW im going to go on a mini rant .

Now without getting into a whole racial rant which by now I think you all know exactly where I stand on that whole subject , I want you to read up on my alma mater West Haven High School and what's going on there .

All read up ..good ! Now my question is why was someone like that even invited to speak at the high school and the principal did everything to ease tensions and apologize for the whole incident which of course the NAACP had a problem with . I have really had it up to here with the NAACP and think someone needs to send a scud missle into the headquarters ..how's that ?
No one ever even mentioned the feelings of the students who were so offended that they walked out of the speech, you know why no one has brought them up ....because they were white , that's why! It is such bullshit

Anyways , let's laugh a little .....

"Sex With Aliens" porn tape along with sex toy and many other bizarre items found at Jacko's crib

For all of you who want to be just like me ( which is probably all of you ) ...Here is a Very handy Bartending Guide. Also features a web tool that allows you to query available drinks based on what liquor you have on hand

Have you heard that Jessica Simpson believed the National Enquirer's story that she was pregnant

From the Powerhouse animation folks comes this test of Flash Animation for the "Clerks" cartoon feature that we debuted at WizardWorld Dallas. Mind you, none of this material will be in the animated movie; this was just the guys showcasing what they could accomplish with Flash. Take a look at the bang-up job they did

Messages buried in the code of three current computer worms may be evidence of a simmering feud between rival worm writers each determined to infect as many PCs as possible.

Here are the top 25 Family Guy episodes ever ..well so far .

An Ethiopian immigrant accused of circumcising his daughter with a pair of scissors when she was 2 years old denied the charge Wednesday and said he is being framed by his ex-wife.

GyroBall...fun little skill game, gets hard and has lots of levels...give it a try

A lawmaker was charged with drunken driving, hours after attending a bill-signing ceremony to highlight the state's newest effort to crack down on DWI offenders.

2 words ...FUCK HALLMARK !

A Morrow County, GA family said their home was peppered from the air with human waste.

Hundreds of photos of kittens. ????

$15,000 art prize given to guy who sticks vials of blood in his ass, stands on his head and lets blood drip into his mouth

I think this guy is pretty clever. He makes poetry out of the subject lines of all the spam he receives each day

Japanese dress-up doll thing. The clothes don't seem to fit very well.

Thursday thoughts

NASA scientists say the Mars rovers have found what they were looking for -- hard evidence that the red planet was once "soaking wet."

Interesting use of technology: The Pinellas County, Florida school district is ready to approve a $2-million system that uses student fingerprints to keep track of who is riding school buses. It will identify students as they board and leave the bus with the goal of ensuring that they are getting on the right bus and getting off at the right stop.

In Portland, Oregon, county officials issued hundreds of licenses to gay couples after deciding that Oregon law allowed the unions.

Connecticut is one of a dozen states with no constitutional standard for impeachment, so the House impeachment committee's 10 members must rely on scholarly and legal research and, ultimately, their own political judgment to determine how to go about doing it. (or not doing it)

A Middletown, CT Superior Court judge ruled Tuesday that a Vernon woman can use the defense that she was engaged in a sex act to fight charges that she caused a 1999 crash that killed a Hartford-area businessman.

Two Japanese companies announced that they will start selling the first two-legged robot, called nuvo. It will retail for 500,000 yen. (It takes a while to load because it's being translated from Japanese to English through the use of Wordlingo.com.)

Excellent news: Fox's cult hit cartoon Family Guy is coming back! (I loved that show.)

America's rarest silver dollar — and possibly its most famous stolen coin — was discovered in a box filled with miscellaneous coins by a Maine librarian who wasn't even a collector.

A Florida golfer defied the odds, racking up three holes in one in the past six months, all while swinging one-handed.

A Los Angeles lawyer who claims he was thrown out of Las Vegas last year because he was too lucky has sued MGM Mirage.

Nice top.

Here's a new twist on female's wrestling in a bar: KY Jelly Wrestling.

Ho Hum: It is being reported that Michael Jackson is holed up in an Aspen hideaway and being treated for a longtime addiction to alcohol and painkillers.

These people ate cockroaches to win Britney Spears concert tickets.

According to gerontologist David Demko, Keith Richards should have died eight years ago.

Rich's Thursday Thoughts

Well I have another very good rant today but im going to spare everyone of it because I have to gather all the facts before I start ranting .

One more day for the CONTEST PHOTO , so get those entries in .

Ok , let's dance ....

To add to Peter's Mars post , they said they found a rock with numbers 19 written it it . here is a wide view of it , and here is a closer view ...you decide ?

I posted a story yesterday about the homeless people who were living in the street in protest and having sex in the middle of the street ...well it was only a matter of time before someone posted those pics on the net .

Someone get the hose , there's a fire sale going on ...The Rangers are giving the house away and the latest casualty is Ct born Brian Leetch

There is something very ,very, very ,very wrong with these people .

Godzilla, at various times Japan's scourge and savior but undoubtedly the country's most famous movie monster, will retire aged 50 with a final movie to be released later this year

Luffarschack, get 5 in a row and you are the winner

Ahh young love ...A young single mom who dreamed of becoming a nurse was brutally stabbed to death yesterday by her insanely jealous beau - who then tore out her heart and dumped it next to her carved-up corpse

When you just cant let go , there's a Replica of Kitt from "Knight Rider".

Ok , goood Night .

Rich's Humpday Happenings

Well it was brought to my attention by one of our more Anal forum members that I forgot to give credit to the author of the "People that are 35 should be dead" poem yesterday . Well I would have given full credit but the person I got it from is not the kind of person that could ever write something like that and I know she didnt write it so there was really no credit to be given , So to that member (you know who you are) ...I will always give props when I get something from someone .

It looks like it's going to be Kerry vs Bush , like there's a difference ?

I saw Monster last night and it was fantastic , make sure you see it if you havent yet .

One more thing , hopefully tommorow I am going to have a guest columnist come to my house and write a olumn that is going to open your eyes to alot of things you probably never knew about and didnt bother to want to think about ..we'll see ?

Ok , time to burn ....

Un FUCKING REAL !!! A 41-year-old man is facing federal child pornography charges for allegedly molesting his 2-month-old daughter, then posting video of the acts over the Internet

As summertime rolls around , remember to wear a helmet . Video's of motorcycle wrecks.

A Man who pisses on passerbys gets fined $50.00

How to interpret photos of DCer's.

A jury was selected Monday to hear the claim of an ailing factory worker who says his rare lung disease was caused by the artificial butter vapors at a microwave popcorn plant.

For all you lushes, I present to you the Dukes of Hazzard Drinking Game. This might be useful for anyone that still watches this show

Charlize Theron died inside when she heard her mother shoot her father dead. Her terrifying account of that night of 21 June 1991 can be told for the first time today

This is cool ...The drum machine.

A homeless couple protesting a lack of housing in Stockholm placed a bed in the middle of a downtown square and had sex in front of numerous spectators

These crazy kids and their damn computers

YEEHAWW !! 1000's of Topless Women to March for Equal Topless Rights

The Michael Jackson soundboard. As freaky as he is, the "Billy Jean" sample reminds me of how talented he is as well.

Malaysia's elections chief has warned parties not to promise favours from God in exchange for votes in the forthcoming elections.

Some very well done photos of Northern Lights

For a 73-year-old Canadian man, 20 months in a smoke-free jail looked just too long, so instead he took 24 months in a prison where he can smoke cigarettes.

Male chastity devices , Noser69 rejoices

Ok , see ya manyana

Rich's Tuesday Commentary

I know , I know ...here he goes again on one of his long winded pointless rants but not this time , this is light hearted and fun today ..Imagine that ?

but first dont forget the CONTEST PHOTO for the week , keep those quotes coming.

People over 35 should be dead by now!

Here's why

According to today's regulators and bureaucrats, those of us who were kids in the 40's, 50's, 60's, or even maybe the early 70's probably shouldn't have survived.

Our baby cribs were covered with bright colored lead-based paint.

We had no childproof lids on medicine bottles, doors or cabinets, ... and when we rode our bikes, we had no helmets. (Not to mention the risks we took hitchhiking.)

As children, we would ride in cars with no seatbelts or air bags.

Riding in the back of a pickup truck on a warm day was always a special treat.

We drank water from the garden hose and not from a bottle. ..Horrors!

We ate cupcakes, bread and butter, and drank soda pop with sugar in it, but we were never overweight because we were always outside playing.

We shared one soft drink with four friends, from one bottle, and no one actually died from this.

We would spend hours building our go-carts out of scraps and then rode down the hill, only to find out we forgot the brakes.

After running into the bushes a few times, we learned to solve the problem.

We would leave home in the morning and play all day, as long as we were back when the street lights came on.

No one was able to reach us all day.

NO CELL PHONES!!!!! ....Unthinkable!

We did not have Playstations, Nintendo 64, X-Boxes, no video games at all, no 99 channels on cable, video tape movies, surround sound, personal cell phones, personal computers, or Internet chat rooms.

We had friends!

We went outside and found them.

We played dodge ball, and sometimes, the ball would really hurt.

We fell out of trees, got cut and broke bones and teeth, and there were no lawsuits from these accidents.

They were accidents.No one was to blame but us...Remember accidents?

We had fights and punched each other and got black and blue and learned to get over it.

We made up games with sticks and tennis balls and ate worms, and although we were told it would happen, we did not put out very many eyes, nor did the worms live inside us forever.

We rode bikes or walked to a friend's home and knocked on the door, or rang the bell or just walked in and talked to them.

Little League had tryouts and not everyone made the team. Those who didn't had to learn to deal with disappointment.

Some students weren't as smart as others, so they failed a grade and were held back to repeat the same grade. ..Horrors!

Tests were not adjusted for any reason. ( I like this one alot)

Our actions were our own.

Consequences were expected.

The idea of a parent bailing us out if we broke a law was unheard of. They actually sided with the law. ..Imagine that!

This generation has produced some of the best risk-takers and problem solvers and inventors, ever.

The past 50 years have been an explosion of innovation and new ideas.

We had freedom, failure, success and responsibility, and we learned how to deal with it all.

And you're one of them! ..Congratulations!

Ok , lets roll into it ...

The world's oldest sport does have its fringe benefits! Fitness expert Lorraine Kelly has revealed that the best way to lose flab and cut down weight is to have sex

In GEEK news : "Matt built the course for Mika in the basement of their house in December, 1996, as a Christmas present. It was assembled in pieces in the paint room, then secretly laid out the evening of December 24th, 1996."

Would you eat a black tomato? If you would your not the only one .

It has really got to suck to be this frigin guy .

I wonder what I'd be buying if I scanned this art with a barcode reader?

666 Appears on Some 'Passion' Tickets. Tickets at one movie theater screening Mel Gibson's "The Passion of the Christ" are being deemed decidedly unholy.

An ammonium perchlorate plant exploded in May 1988 near Las Vegas (Henderson, NV). A fire and two massive blasts, the largest of which exceeded the equivalent of 1.5 million pounds of TNT, killed two people, resulted in the complete loss of the plant, and caused over $70 million in damages to the surrounding community..here is the video

Two policemen died from gunshot wounds after what appears to have been an old-fashioned duel

DONT CLICK THIS LINK ... seriously.. don't !

A farmer was jailed for two years Monday for pushing a woman vet's face into a pile of manure and cow urine.

An encyclopedia on mythology, folklore, and legend...for all you Dungeons & Dragons geeks (you know who you are SPUNKY)

A leading health expert has determined that high-rolling, hard-living Rolling Stones guitarist Keith Richards should have died eight years ago

And to finish the day off , Here are some Accidental deaths by self-bondage

Ok , dont forget to vote in The Advocate's readers poll, I will post the link tommorow if you didnt vote yet .

Monday morning musings

Let's start off with this funny photo.

In a virtual sweep of the awards that "honor" the worst of the very worst in Hollywood -- a sort-of anti-Oscar, the Jennifer Lopez-Ben Affleck mega-flop, Gigli, was accorded the Golden Raspberry on Saturday as worst film of the year.

This is for Richie.

In an effort to combat spam, Microsoft and Yahoo! Inc. are each developing systems aimed at authenticating senders of e-mail. America Online Inc. is testing a third.

Weird video: The Cat with Hands.

There's a $45,000 consolation gift basket for nonwinning nominees at the Oscars, and the winners' and presenters' gift baskets are each worth $110,000.

Check out Bathroom Mania: Interesting stuff.

Disneyland's Mad Tea Party ride, with 18 giant spinning teacups, was recently modified in the name of safety to make it harder for people to spin.

Go paint on a wall.

Two police officers in the Atlanta, Georgia area are expected to resign, after accusations that the pair bet on who could write the most traffic tickets.

Check out this chrome Mercedes.

Gabby Gingras has a disease so rare she's the only person her parents and doctors can find in the U.S. suffering from it. What's she suffering from? She feels no pain.

Here are some Saddam capture photos that did not make the news.

A New Orleans man was arrested after calling the Sheriff's Office to complain he had been ripped off attempting to trade a microwave oven for crack cocaine.

Safe for Work porn.

The Ultimate IQ test.

Check out how well this person draws.

Some games: Battleship, Bush shootout, Mars mission, Trap Shooting, and Space Fighter Rebellion.

Rich's Monday Supercolumn

And just when I thought Peter forgot about me , he goes and gives me a nice present like he did today in his column ...** Im Blushing **

Ok there will be no Contest winner this week because something happened with my email and I lost all the entries ,sorry but we are going to try it again.....So Here is this week's CONTEST PICTURE and as always send all entries to richie@thedailycolumn.com and put "Daily Column " in the title so I know to look for it .

Also Dont forget to vote in the New Haven Advocate's Best Of Readers Poll , and make sure #67 says Rich from Donovans Reef and #76 + #113 says Donovans Reef

Ok , like Tone Loc said , "Lets Do It " .....

Pet owners in a central Italian town must pamper their dogs, cats and birds and even show mercy to supper-time lobsters or face fines as high as 500 euros

Finally, the 1001st pong variation

Nudity might be all the rage at Rio de Janeiro's famous Carnival that ended this week, but an Australian tourist has learned not to try it beside the city's landmark Christ the Redeemer statue.

An Explanation of l33t Speak

A TEENAGER was jailed after killing his girlfriends cat, slicing off its paws and giving them to her saying they would bring her luck.

Find your name in the news and pretend to be important. I did and it was very fulfilling!

A WOMAN claimed she was having group sex with 30 men in Nimbin, NSW, and could not get to a polling booth in Queensland on time to vote

Looks like we're finally getting close to the jetson's suitcase car. Well, sort of.

A MARRIED British priest has been suspended after allegedly posting a nude photo of himself on a raunchy internet dating site. The colour picture of Bob Locke, 41, is believed to have appeared with a message inviting women to contact him for "straight sex".

Damn yo, P-Unit busts out another phat pirate rap track. Oh and .. "HARRRRRRRRR."

Ok that's it for me tonight ...Lord of the Rings rocked the Oscars last night too !